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24 FAMOUS CHARACTERS WHO ALMOST HAD DIFFERENT NAMES

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Any writer will tell you: The name has to match the character.

Just take a stroll through another Why Not 100 list—the 70 best character names in literature—and try to re-imagine many of those names. It’s not easy. What if Huckleberry Finn was Nat Bricklebush? What if a Golden Ticket (found inside a Lervin bar) earned you a tour of Larry Lervin’s chocolate factory? What if Hannibal Lechter was Ernest Munch?

Literature is filled with iconic characters whose names have become so part of our collective psyche that we can’t quite imagine them being anything else. Count Dracula. Sherlock Holmes. Ebenezer Scrooge. Gandalf the Grey.

But then, we didn’t see the first drafts.

Here are two-dozen classic characters whose iconic names were not the originals:

1.Count Dracula

Originally, Bram Stoker called his legendary vampire “Count Waympr.” But then he came across a historical account of Vlad II of Wallachia, otherwise known as Vlad Dracul. Besides the literary impact, fans of Count Chocula breakfast cereal are grateful.

2.Sherlock Holmes

Sherringford was an early choice by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, which would have let to a whole generation of boys saying, “No shit, Sherringford.”

3.Dr. Watson

Fascinating factoid: Literature’s Sherlock Holmes never actually uttered the phrase most attributed to him. He said, “Elementary!” And he said, “My dear Watson.” But never in the same sentence until a 1929 film called The Return of Sherlock Holmes. But imagine this: “Elementary, my dear Sacker.” Holmes’s friend was nearly named Ormond Sacker.


4.Scarlett O’Hara

Legend has it that just before Gone with the Wind went to print, Margaret Mitchell changed her main character’s name from Pansy to Scarlett. Maybe she became aware of the need when she reexamined the scenes between the maid Prissy and her mistress Pansy.

5.Little Orphan Annie

Speaking of which… cartoonist Harold Gray’s original pitch was about exploring explore the adventures of a little orphan boy named Otto, complete with adorable curls. But newspaper publisher Joseph Medill Patterson supposedly responded (remember this was the 1920s), “The kid looks like a pansy to me. Put a skirt on him, and we’ll call it ‘Little Orphan Annie.’”


6.Hermione Granger

You’re creating a character, a girl who is smart and serious and acutely aware of the dangers that surround her. So what do you name her? Hermione Puckle. Realizing that the surname “didn’t suit her at all,” Joanne Rowling smartly renamed her. Interestingly, continuing an odd theme here, Hermione’s foil at Hogwarts is Pansy Parkinson.

7.Nancy Drew

The original author’s name is a pseudonym itself—Carolyn Keene being the combined creation of sisters Benson and Harriet Adams. As for their literary creation, the girl detective was almost named Diane Dare, Helen Hale, even Stella Strong. Why they settled on Nancy Drew is a bit of a mystery.

8.Holly Golightly

Truman Capote’s lyrically named protagonist from Breakfast at Tiffany’s had a decidedly non-musical moniker in early drafts: Connie Gustafson.

9.Philip Marlowe

“Mallory” was the original choice, presumably an homage by Raymond Chandler to English author Sir Thomas Malory. But his wife thought “Marlowe” sounded more hard-boiled. She was right.

10.John Falstaff

He appears in three Shakespearean plays, this corpulent comic foil of a knight. But the Immortal Bard originally wrote him as “John Oldcastle”—until a fellow named Lord Cobham, descendant of a real fellow named Sir John Oldcastle—complained.


11.Lucy Frost

She was Charlotte Bronte protagonist in Villette, but she was first christened “Lucy Snowe.” And Bronte apparently wished she had kept the original. “I rather regretted the name change,” she later admitted. “A cold name she must have.”

12.Susan, Edmund and Lucy Pevensie

The younger siblings of Peter Pevensie, High King of Narnia, were called “Ann” and “Martin” and “Rose” in an early version of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.

13.Charlotte A. Cavatica

No, it wouldn’t have changed the title of Charlotte’s Web, but E.B. White originally imagined her as a Grey Cross spider (Epeira sclopetaria), so she was known as “Charlotte Epeira.” But this perfect pig publicist was actually a barn spider—Araneus cavaticus. So E.B. White humbly changed the eight-legged one’s last name.

14.Artemis Fowl

Eoin Colfer named the title character of his Artemis Fowl books after Artemis (the goddess of archery and hunting) and Fowler (an Irish name that sounded like “foul.” Said Colfer, “It’s the nasty hunter basically.” But his initial name was “Archimedes.” Said Colfer, “I wanted a classic Greek name that would have an air of intelligence and genius about it. But I thought people would think it’s a book about Archimedes.”

15.Marvin the Paranoid Android

My son Luke loves A Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, his favorite character being the robot afflicted with severe depression. But author Douglas Adams originally wanted to name the character after a rather socially inept friend of his named Andrew Marshall. So it would have been “Marshall the Paranoid Android.” Don’t tell the android. It’ll just upset him.

16.Tiny Tim

This one is likely legend misread as fact. It has been claimed that Charles Dickens considered a few other names for his sickly child in A Christmas Carol. “Little Larry” was one. Not too bad. “Small Sam” was another. Meh. “Puny Pete was a third. Ugh. Then again, was anyone in the 19th century really known as Larry?


But wait, there’s more. We have arrived at the J.R.R. Tolkien portion of our list.

17.Beorn

The man-bear of The Hobbit originally had a name that meant “bear” in Russian—“Medwed.”

18.Smaug

The great and terrible dragon of the Lonely Mountain was difficult to kill. His original name was difficult to say—“Pryftan.”

19.Aragorn (aka Strider)

It would have been a lot tougher for Viggo Mortensen to look quite so heroic in The Lord of the Rings trilogy if the returned king’s name had been the original—“Peregrin Boffin.” Even his nickname was originally Trotter.

20.Pippin Took

Tolkien eventually gave him the Peregrin moniker. But this hobbit was originally “Odo.”

21.Merry Brandybuck.

Meriadoc was the long version in the books, and it sounds a bit like the original—believe it or not, “Marmaduke.”


22.Frodo Baggins

He carried a dark and dangerous burden. He was the courageous young fellow on whom the residents of Middle Earth pinned their final hopes. But the character’s original name makes him sound like something from Dr. Seuss—“Bingo Bolger-Baggins.”

23.Gandalf the Grey

Notes written in pencil on early drafts of The Hobbit show that the great wizard was originally “Bladorthin the Grey.” Yup. Eventually, Bladorthin became merely the name of a long-dead king mentioned in passing only once in Tolkien’s writings.

24.Thorin Oakenshield

Believe it or not, the dwarven king was originally named “Gandalf.”




93 UNFORGETTABLE ANIMALS IN BOOKS

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Author and poet Kwame Alexander’s delightful 2011 picture book, Acoustic Rooster and His Barnyard Band, tells the story of a jazz-loving rooster who recruits his friends—pianist Duck Ellington, singer Bee Holiday, percussionist piggy Pepe Ernesto Cruz—in an attempt to win a barnyard talent show. There’s some stiff competition from the likes of Mules Davis and Ella Finchgerald, but the riffing rooster comes to realize the power of understanding that you can’t go it alone.

It’s another in a long literary line in which creatures of all sorts capture the imagination of readers, young and old. So we at the Why Not 100 have recruited Kwame Alexander. Since October 14 is generally regarded as Winnie the Pooh’s birthday, we’ve asked him to help us choose the 93 most iconic animal characters in literature.
First, some rules of the rankings: We’re covering books only. No comics. No short stories. No fairy tales. No films that later became books. So alas, we couldn’t include Snoopy or the Ugly Duckling or the Big Bad Wolf, as much we’d like to. And we’re limiting it to one animal per book. So, for instance, although we adore Wilbur from Charlotte’s Web, he wasn’t the title character after all. And while everyone loves Piglet and we particularly identify with Eeyore, could we really choose anyone but that title character?  For the same reason, you won’t find Toto or the Cheshire Cat on the list either. Also, one choice per book series. Thus a single Harry Potter character (it had to be Hedwig) and only one from the Chronicles of Narnia series (that one’s obvious, too).

No real animals. Sorry, Seabiscuit. And no fantastical animals either—no unicorns or dragons or half-humans like Beorn the man-bear from The Hobbit. That means Bram Stoker’s bat (Dracula) and Franz Kafka’s man-cockroach (The Metamorphosis) don’t make the cut. We did bend the rules slightly to allow a half-dog, half-clock— that would be Tock from The Phantom Tollbooth. Why? Well, we absolutely love that book.

The animals must be named in some way. Therefore, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s hound in The Hound of the Baskervilles is barking up the wrong tree. Same with John Steinbeck’s mice, in a manner of speaking, as well as Harper Lee’s mockingbird.

Although you’ll find plenty of beloved character’s from children’s tales, don’t assume that that all will be young readers’ icons (thank you, George Orwell) or even beloved at all (we’re thinking of a particular shark). You’ll find animal characters from the likes of everyone from Homer and Charles Dickens to Agatha Christie and Stephen King (yes, that rabid dog).

And you’ll probably think we missed some. There are MANY memorable animals that didn’t quite make the cut—from horses like Cadoc (Eragon) to rabbits like Edward Tulane (The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane) to dozens of deserving dogs in books by luminaries like J.M. Barrie, Thomas Pynchon, Paul Auster, Leo Tolstoy, George Eliot, and Jules Verne.

Still, we think you’ll appreciate the list. And we’ll start with the best of the best—the top 25, as ranked by Kwame Alexander:

THE TOP 25:

1.The Cat in the Hat (The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss)


2.Winnie-the-Pooh (Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A. Milne)
3.Anansi the Spider (Anansi the Spider: An Ashanti Tale)
4.Moby Dick (Moby-Dick by Herman Melville)
5.The Very Hungry Caterpillar (The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle)
6.Piggie (Elephant and Piggie by Mo Willems)
7.Charlotte (Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White)
8.Curious George (Curious George series by Margret and Hans Augusto Rey)
9.Horton (Horton Hears a Who by Dr. Seuss)
10.Jaws (Jaws by Peter Benchley)

11.Cowardly Lion (The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum)
12.Br’er Rabbit (Uncle Remus by Joel Chandler Harris)
13.Algernon (Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes)
14.Buck (The Call of the Wild by Jack London)
15.Peter Rabbit (The Tale of Peter Rabbit by Beatrix Potter)
16.White Rabbit (Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll)
17.Richard Parker (Life of Pi by Yann Martel)
18.Clifford (Clifford the Big Red Dog by Norman Bridwell)
19.Olivia (Olivia series by Ian Falconer)
20.Stuart Little (Stuart Little by E.B. White)


21.Babar (The Story of Babar by Jean de Brunhoff)
22.Rainbow Fish (The Rainbow Fish by Marcus Pfister)
23.Black Beauty (Black Beauty by Anna Sewell)
24.Rocinante (Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra)
25.Acoustic Rooster (Acoustic Rooster and His Barnyard Band by Kwame Alexander…You had to know this was coming, folks!)

THE BEST OF THE REST (BY SPECIES)

HORSES
26.The Black Stallion (The Black Stallion by Walter Farley)
27.Pilgrim (The Horse Whisperer by Nicholas Evans)
28.Gabilan (The Red Pony by John Steinbeck)
29.Gunpowder (The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving)
30.The Piebald (National Velvet by Enid Bagnold)
31.Flicka (My Friend Flicka by Mary O’Hara)
32.Robert (Robert the Rose Horse by Joan Heilbroner)
33.Shadowfax (The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien)
34.Joey (War Horse by Michael Morpurgo)


BEARS
35.Paddington Bear (A Bear Called Paddington by Michael Bond)
36.Brother Bear (The Berenstain Bears series by Stan, Jan and Mike Berenstain)
37.Gentle Ben (Gentle Ben by Walt Morey)
38.Ben (The Life and Times of Grizzly Adams by Charles E. Sellier, Jr.)
39.Old Ben (Go Down, Moses by William Faulkner)

PIGS
40.Snowball (Animal Farm by George Orwell)
41.Babe (The Sheep-Pig by Dick King-Smith)
42.Lester (Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle by Betty MacDonald)
43.Empress of Blandings (Blandings Castle series by P.G. Wodehouse)


MICE
44.Martin the Warrior (Redwall series by Brian Jacques)
45.Vera (Vera the Mouse series by Marjolein Bastin)

RABBITS
46.Velveteen Rabbit (The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams)
47.Peter Cottontail (The Adventures of Peter Cottontail by Thornton Burgess)

BIRDS
48.Jonathan Livingston Seagull (Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach)
49.Cap’n Flint the parrot (Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson)
50.Polynesia the parrot (The Story of Doctor Dolittle by Hugh Lofting)
51.Hedwig the owl (Harry Potter series)
52.Captain Cook the penguin (Mr. Popper’s Penguins by Richard and Florence Atwater)
53.Mrs. Mallard (Make Way For Ducklings by Robert McCloskey)
54.Soren the owl (Guardians of Ga’hoole series by Kathryn Lasky)


CATS
55.Puss in Boots (Puss in Boots by Charles Perrault)
56.Socks (Socks by Beverly Cleary)
57.Midnight Louie (Midnight Louie series by Carole Nelson Douglas)
58.Good Fortune (The Cat Who Went to Heaven by Elizabeth Coatsworth)
59.Cat (It’s Like This, Cat by Emily Cheney Neville)
60.Pete (Pete the Cat: I Love My White Shoes by Eric Litwin)
61.Old Deuteronomy (Old Possum’s Book of Practical Cats by T.S. Eliot)


DOGS
62.Argos (The Odyssey by Homer)
63.Old Yeller (Old Yeller by Fred Gipson)
64.Pongo (The Hundred and One Dalmatians by Dodie Smith)
65.Beautiful Joe (Beautiful Joe by Margaret Marshall Saunders)
66.Tock (The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster)
67.Enzo (The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein)
68.Cujo (Cujo by Stephen King)
69.Poky (The Poky Little Puppy by Janette Sebring Lowrey)
70.Einstein (Watchers by Dean Koontz)
71.Bob (Dumb Witness by Agatha Christie)
72.Hank (Hank the Cowdog by John R. Erickson)
73.Luath (The Incredible Journey by Sheila Burnford)
74.Karenin (The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera)
75.Petula (Molly Moon series by Georgia Byng)
76.Flush (Flush by Virginia Woolf)
77.Bull’s-eye (Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens)
78.Squirrel (A Dog’s Life by Ann M. Martin)
79.Little Ann (Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls)
80.Walter (Walter the Farting Dog by William Kotzwinkle)


WOLVES
81.White Fang (White Fang by Jack London)
82.Carcharoth (The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien)

FOXES
83.Mr. Fox (Fantastic Mr. Fox by Roald Dahl)
84.Tod (The Fox and the Hound by Daniel P. Mannix)

ASSORTED ANIMALS
85.Bambi (Bambi, A Life in the Woods by Felix Salten)
86.Aslan (The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis)
87.Frog and Toad (Frog and Toad Are Friends by Arnold Lobel)
88.Mr. Toad (The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame)
89.Zira the ape (Planet of the Apes by Pierre Boulle)
90.Kala the ape (Tarzan of the Apes by Edgar Rice Burroughs)
91.Baloo the bear (Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling)
92.Rikki-Tikki-Tavi the mongoose (Rikki-Tikki-Tavi by Rudyard Kipling)
93.Elmer the elephant (Elmer the Patchwork Elephant by David McKee)



49 WITTY TWEETS BY R.L. STINE

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R.L. Stine has been called the “Stephen King of children’s literature.” He has written, literally, hundreds of books and has racked up sales in the hundreds of millions. On his Twitter feed, he describes his job as “to terrify kids.” And in fact, he is nearly as prolific at tweeting as he is at writing.

We at the Why Not 100 love an epic book, but we well know that it is also a talent to write pithily. And while horror can be fun, humor can be funnier. It’s why our blog celebrates everything from top headlines from “The Onion” to Steven Wright’s best one-liners.

Twitter, of course, asks for 140 characters of pithy. With that in mind, we scrolled through R.L. Stine’s Twitter feed (@RL_Stine) over a two-month span last year—naturally, the 60 days surrounding Halloween—and came up with this list of our favorites:

1.Oct. 21, 2013: “I’m flattered & honored to have 100,000 followers. I plan to invite you all over for drinks. Keep watching for details.”

2.Nov., 21, 2013: “I see I was passed over again by the Nat’l Book Awards. I thought Son of Slappy stood a chance, but better writers prevailed.”

3.Nov. 4, 2013: “Did you know that monkeys can blush? I didn’t either. What do you think you have to do to make a monkey blush?”


4.Oct. 4, 2013: “Quoth the raven, “What’s up, Doc?” (--Edgar Allen Poe first draft)”

5.Oct. 12, 2013: “Warning: If peg legs freak you out, you’re in trouble tonight. #TheHauntingHour”

6.Nov. 1, 2013: “Good news: The UN has formed a committee to let us know when a deadly asteroid is hurtling toward earth.”

7.Oct. 17, 2013: “Yes, there is a calendar of tattooed librarians. #notmakingthisup”


8.Oct. 21, 2013: “Is your house haunted? A new website will tell you if someone died in your house… Diedinhouse.com works for any address.”

9.Nov. 28, 2013: “Since we don’t believe in killing turkeys, we always have ham, roast beef, and duck. Have a joyous holiday, everyone.”

10.Nov. 3, 2013: “Your nightmare for tonight: Box jellyfish have heads a ft wide & tentacles 550 ft long. If you’re stung, you have 4 minutes to live.”

11.Nov. 20, 2013: “The largest bovine in the world? Glad you asked. I’m sure you’ll agree this is a lot of bull.”

12.Nov. 22, 2013: “In time for your lunch, I thought you might enjoy this selection of delicious monkey brains.”

13.Nov. 11, 2013: “What would YOU do if your dog brought home a human leg? Write a horror movie about it?”

14.Oct. 16, 2013: “Has anyone tried the Pecan Pie flavored Pringles?”

15.Oct. 5, 2013: “Coen Bros.’ “Inside Llewyn Davis”—Best Supporting Performance by a Cat. You’ll see what I mean.”

16.Oct. 14, 2013: “A jack-o-lantern freak or a pie fan? Last week on Long Island, someone stole 600 pumpkins.”

17.Nov. 14, 2013: “Scientists estimate 100 million homeless cats roam the U.S. These cats kill a BILLION birds a year. #natureishorrifying”

18.Oct. 28, 2013: “The Onion writes about Fear Street. Love the comments, especially the people who don’t think I’m real.”

19.Nov. 12, 2013: “A Florida man said his neighbors were mean and wouldn’t drink with him. So he called 911.”

20.Nov. 1, 2013: “A GA man after rescuing his family from their burning house, rushed back into the flames to save his Bud Light. #notmakingthisup”

21.Oct. 16, 2013: “Is the Magic Restroom Café the WORST restaurant ever? For one thing, diners sit on TOILETS. Seriously.”

22.Nov. 4, 2013: “Emergency crews rushed to a 6th grade classroom in Queens, NY when a hazardous smell was reported. Turned out to be Axe body spray.”

23.Oct. 6, 2013: “The most violent, dangerous states in the U.S.? A survey lists the states with most violent crimes per 100,000. The top 5…”

24.Oct. 6, 2013: “…5. S. Carolina 4. New Mexico 3. Alaska 2. Nevada. And the most dangerous state—a surprise, I think—it’s Tennessee.”

25.Nov. 26, 2013: “Don’t believe in ghosts? Boy killed in tornado shows up in photo TWO MONTHS LATER.”



26.Oct. 31, 2013: “News Flash: Aliso Niguel High School in Orange County, CA has banned twerking at school dances.”

27.Oct. 12, 2013: “Something New to Worry About: Ticks may be tiniest, most dangerous creatures on earth.”

28.Oct. 4, 2013: “Here’s a job you might like: NASA is looking for people to lie in bed 24 hours a day for 10 weeks. They want to see what happens…”

29.Oct. 4, 2013: “…to normal people when they do this. The pay for staying in bed for 10 weeks? $12,000. Do you qualify?”

30.Oct. 15, 2013: “I watched This is The End this afternoon. It’s horrible, but it made me laugh a lot.”

And in that same two-month span, I came across these terrific re-tweets from Stine:

31.@MikeJFear: “@RL_Stine since my last name is Fear do I get a special prize?”

32.@juskewitch: “A kiddie pool with a carrot floating in it would look odd to you and me but to a snowman it would be horrifying.”

33.@mayhemll: “I’ve started reading: #Goosebumps books on the train to work in an attempt to meet guys. It’s working. Much obliged @RL_Stine, much obliged.”

34.@maidofstarstuff: “Watching @RL_Stine’s Goosebumps just like it was 20 years ago… except now I have vodka.”

35.@tsokolove: “FUN FACT: I once graced the cover of an @RL_Stine book. I’m the “prom date” killed off in the first chapter…”

36.@KnoxBlevins: “Started reading the Prologue of Red Rain on Amazon… Take my money. Just take it.”

37.@JenCrittenden: “Black Friday presents a conundrum. I like shopping but I also like trampling people.”



38.@WyattBertsch: “when I was a 90’s kid, I pretended The Haunted Mask didn’t scare me. Now, I have no one to act macho for. And I’m still scared.”

39.@AndyRichter: “Watching old episodes of Goosebumps that’s set in Louisiana. Entire cast made the bold choice to speak with Canadian accents.”

40.@Daltongrandon: “Couldn’t find a Goosebumps skateboard on ebay, so I decided to make one, now just need wheels.”

41.@CodyRaines: “@RL_Stine Hey Mr. Stine I’m going to be you for Halloween.”

42.@banubelle: “the scariest books for me has always been the night of the living dummy ones. I threw away most of my toys because of them”

43.@aiahrachel: “Just learned a fabulous and horrifying new expression: “best horse in the glue factory.” Yowza.”

44.@ameliedepoulan: “@RL_Stine Greetings from Peru, sir. Thank you for everything. I had an amazing childhood because of you! :)”

45.@cryptor_chid: “@RL_Stine idea for a story: teenage girl hears her refrigerator breathing and it comes to life and eats her. Based on a true story.”

46.@KinsleyOfficial: “Damn Goosebumps books have me hooked all over again. I’m staying up too late and hiding under the covers like it’s 1995.”

47.@fordhughes: “what advice would u give a young thug with ambitionz as a wridah?”

48.@laurenreeves: “911, what’s your emergency?”
“Hi. Long time listener, first time caller.”
“That’s really funny.”
“Thank you. Anyways, I’m being stabbed.”

49.@emhig: “I just discovered that I remember the plot of every Goosebumps book. @RL_Stine, how can I use this in my daily life?”





76 BOOKS FOR THE 20TH CENTURY, YEAR BY YEAR

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You want to troll for a date? Try a bookstore. Or better yet, read a book.

Have you resolved to learn about the Norman invasion of England? Pick up a copy of David Howarth’s 1066: The Year of the Conquest. The first permanent settlement in the New World? Karen Lange wrote 1607: A New Look at Jamestown. America’s origins? How about David McCullough’s 1776.

You can read 1492: The Year the World Began by Felipe Fernandez-Armesto. But if you want some more historical context, you can also pick up a couple of books by a fellow named Charles C. Mann—1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus and 1493: Uncovering the New World Columbus Created.

As much as those distant histories fascinate us at the Why Not 100, this is a post about more recent historical accounts. And as much as we love 2001: A Space Odyssey, we’re going to focus on the 20th century.  If you have the time and the inclination, you can give yourself and at-home education by simply journeying through the century one book at a time.


Not every year offers a suitable selection (we decided the year has to be somewhere in the title). On the other hand, some years offer myriad possibilities. There are two books titled 1913, another called 1913: The Eve of War. And there’s 1913: In Search of the World Before the Great War. And 1913: The Year Before the Storm. And so on.

The following is a list of 76 books about 76 years, from novels (i.e. 1984) to biographical studies (Elvis 1956), from broad nonfiction (1949: The First Israelis) to very specific accounts (Stars in the Shadows: The Negro League All-Star Game of 1934), from Dallas 1963 by Bill Minutaglio and Steven L. Davis to October 1964 by David Halberstam.

We’ll start with a novel by Robert Conroy (1901), who also wrote books titled 1862… and 1920… and 1942… and 1945

1.1901 by Robert Conroy
2.The 1902 Pittsburgh Pirates: Treachery and Triumph by Ronald T. Waldo
3.The 1903 World Series: The Boston Americans, the Pittsburg Pirates, and the "First Championship of the United States” by Andy Dabilis
4.1904 St. Louis World's Fair by Michael W. Lemberger and Leigh Michaels


5.1905 by Leon Trotsky
6.1906: A Novel by James Dalessandro
7.The Panic of 1907: Lessons Learned from the Market's Perfect Storm by Robert F. Bruner and Sean D. Carr
8.America, 1908: The Dawn of Flight, the Race to the Pole, the Invention of the Model T, and the Making of a Modern Nation by Jim Rasenberger
9.1911 The First 100 Years by Patrick Sweeney
10.1912: Wilson, Roosevelt, Taft and Debs—The Election that Changed the Country by James Chace
11.1913: In Search of the World Before the Great War by Charles Emmerson
12.The Lost History of 1914: Reconsidering the Year the Great War Began by Jack Beatty
13.1915: The Death of Innocence by Lyn MacDonald
14.The Price of Glory: Verdun 1916 by Sir Alistair Horne
15.1917: Red Banners, White Mantle by Warren H. Carroll
16.1918: A Very British Victory by Peter Hart
17.Paris 1919: Six Months That Changed the World by Margaret MacMillan, Richard Holbrooke and Casey Hampton
18.1920: The Year of the Six Presidents by David Pietrusza
19.1921: The Yankees, the Giants, and the Battle for Baseball Supremacy in New York by Lyle Spatz, Steve Steinberg and Charles C. Alexander


20.Constellation of Genius: 1922: Modernism Year One by Kevin Jackson
21.In 1926: Living on the Edge of Time by Hans Ulrich Gumbrecht
22.One Summer: America, 1927 by Bill Bryson
23.1928 by C. S. Alexander
24.The Great Crash 1929 by John Kenneth Galbraith
25.New York 1930: Architecture and Urbanism Between the Two World Wars by Robert A.M. Stern, Gregory F. Gilmartin and Thomas Mellins
26.The 1931 Hastings Bank Job and the Bloody Bandit Trail by Monty McCord
27.The Speakeasies of 1932 by Al Hirschfeld and Gordon Kahn
28.America 1933: The Great Depression, Lorena Hickok, Eleanor Roosevelt, and the Shaping of the New Deal by Michael Golay
29.Stars in the Shadows: The Negro League All-Star Game of 1934 by Charles R. Smith Jr. and Frank Morrison
30.The Boys in the Boat: Nine Americans and Their Epic Quest for Gold at the 1936 Berlin Olympics by Daniel James Brown
31.Moscow, 1937 by Karl Schlögel
32.1938: Hitler's Gamble by Giles MacDonogh
33.1939: Countdown to War by Richard Overy
34.1940: FDR, Willkie, Lindbergh, Hitler-the Election amid the Storm by Susan Dunn
35.December 1941: 31 Days that Changed America and Saved the World by Craig Shirley and Gen. P.X. Kelley

36.1942: The Year That Tried Men's Souls by Winston Groom
37.The End: Hamburg 1943 by Hans Erich Nossack
38.Warsaw 1944: Hitler, Himmler, and the Warsaw Uprising by Alexandra Richie
39.Year Zero: A History of 1945 by Ian Buruma
40.The Dream Team of 1947 by Arno Paul Niemand
41.1948: Harry Truman's Improbable Victory and the Year that Transformed America by David Pietrusza
42.1949: The First Israelis by Tom Segev and Arlen N. Weinstein
43.Accordion War: Korea 1951: Life and Death in a Marine Rifle Company by Charles Hughes
44.Shoot Them Down! - The Flying Saucer Air Wars of 1952 by Jr, Frank Feschino
45.The Coup: 1953, The CIA, and The Roots of Modern U.S.-Iranian Relations by Ervand Abrahamian
46..721: A History of the 1954 Cleveland Indians by Gary Webster
47.Mississippi Trial, 1955 by Chris Crowe
48.Elvis 1956 by Alfred Wertheimer


49.Little Rock Girl 1957: How a Photograph Changed the Fight for Integration by Shelley Tougas
50.The Best Game Ever: Giants vs. Colts, 1958, and the Birth of the Modern NFL by Mark Bowden
51.Early Wynn, the Go-Go White Sox and the 1959 World Series by Lew Freedman
52.1960—LBJ vs. JFK vs. Nixon: The Epic Campaign That Forged Three Presidencies by David Pietrusza
53.Freedom Riders: 1961 and the Struggle for Racial Justice by Raymond Arsenault
54.The First America's Team: The 1962 Green Bay Packers by Bob Berghaus
55.Dallas 1963 by Bill Minutaglio and Steven L. Davis
56.October 1964 by David Halberstam
57.The Eve of Destruction: How 1965 Transformed America by James T. Patterson
58.1967: Israel, the War, and the Year that Transformed the Middle East by Tom Segev
59.1968: The Year That Rocked the World by Mark Kurlansky
60.1969: The Year Everything Changed by Rob Kirkpatrick


61.Fire and Rain: The Beatles, Simon and Garfunkel, James Taylor, CSNY, and the Lost Story of 1970 by David Browne
62.1971: A Global History of the Creation of Bangladesh by Srinath Raghavan
63.1972: The Summit Series, Canada vs. USSR: Stats, Lies & Videotape: The Untold Story of Hockey's Series of the Century by Richard J Bendell
64.1973 Nervous Breakdown: Watergate, Warhol, and the Birth of Post-Sixties America by Andreas Killen
65.Game Six: Cincinnati, Boston, and the 1975 World Series: The Triumph of America's Pastime by Mark Frost
66.1978: Crashed Memories by Ger-I Lewis
67.Strange Rebels: 1979 and the Birth of the 21st Century by Christian Caryl
68.The Boys of Winter: The Untold Story of a Coach, a Dream, and the 1980 U.S. Olympic Hockey Team by Wayne Coffey and Jim Craig
69.The Original 1982 by Lori Carson
70.Holding the Line: Women in the Great Arizona Mine Strike of 1983 by Barbara Kingsolver
71.1984 by George Orwell
72.1985 by Anthony Burgess
73.The 1986 Masters: How Jack Nicklaus Roared Back to Win by John Boyette


74.Revolution 1989: The Fall of the Soviet Empire by Victor Sebestyen
75.Twilight: Los Angeles, 1992 by Anna Deavere Smith
76.1996 by Gloria Naylor





66 BEST SONGS WRITTEN ABOUT ROAD TRIPS

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When authors are in need of subject matter to carry the narrative along, two arteries in particular are popular fodder. One is love found and love lost, be it Lolita or Frankenstein. The other is the road trip, whether that means On the Road or The Lord of the Rings. The same is true, probably more so even, in songwriting. And I love a good road-trip song. 
I’ve written three American travel memoirs. I’ve visited each of the contiguous 48 states several times over. My wife and I take a road trip/publicity tour in a house on wheels for a couple of months every summer. So I know this: The view through the front windshield can seem like an epic movie of America playing before you, but it can always be enhanced by a good soundtrack to complement the scenery. 
So in honor of U.S. Route 66, which celebrates its 88th anniversary this month, here are 66 road-trip-themed tunes that will put a smile on your face as you hug the center line: 
1.Me and Bobby McGee (Janis Joplin)
My favorite song. Kris Kristofferson wrote it. Janis Joplin nailed it. But really, you can’t go wrong with any cover of this classic, whether you’re listening to Johnny Cash, Joan Baez, Sheryl Crow, or Pink. Or a really remarkable version by Jerry Lee Lewis. As the song says, “Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose.” 

2.On the Road Again (Willie Nelson)
Willie Nelson’s voice simply sounds like a ramble down an open highway. “The life I love is making music with my friends, and I can’t wait to get on the road again.” This is THE iconic road trip song.
3.Born to be Wild (Steppenwolf)
Not every road trip song has to be mellow. Sure, you’ll generally picture Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper on two-wheeled transportation, but this 1969 classic will “get your motor running” anyway. 
4.Thunder Road (Bruce Springsteen)
The Boss is the man when it comes to epic road trip songs, from “Rosalita” to “Born to Run” to “Darlington County.” But this is his best: “So roll down your window and let the wind blow back your hair. The night’s busting open. These two lanes will take us anywhere…”
5.King of the Road (Roger Miller)
It’s old school. It’s simple. But when you’re driving beneath the redwoods or along the Blue Ridge Parkway or through the Black Hills, you feel just like the song title. 
6.Take It Easy (The Eagles)
When you’re runnin’ down the load trying to loosen your load, consider this: You can take a drive along Route 66 to Winslow, Arizona, and Standin’ On the Corner Park, an intersection where there’s actually a flatbed Ford parked there and a mural of a woman “slowing down to take a look at me.” 

THE NEXT 60:

7.Take Me Home, Country Roads (John Denver)

8.Turn the Page (Bob Seger)
9.Ramblin’ Man (Allman Brothers)
10.Road to Nowhere (Talking Heads)


11.I’ve Been Everywhere (Johnny Cash)
12.Truckin’ (Grateful Dead)
13.Free Ride (Edgar Winter Group)
14.Sweet Home Alabama (Lynyrd Skynyrd)
15.Homeward Bound (Simon & Garfunkel)
16.East Bound and Down (Jerry Reed)
17.Over the Hills and Far Away (Led Zeppelin)
18.Born to Run (Bruce Springsteen)
19.Up Around the Bend (Creedence Clearwater Revival)
20.Free Bird (Lynyrd Skynyrd)
21.On the Road to Find Out (Cat Stevens)
22.Radar Love (Golden Earring)

23.Midnight Rider (Allman Brothers)
24.Gotta Travel On (Bob Dylan)
25.The Long Way Home (Norah Jones)
26.Life is a Highway (Tom Cochrane)
27.(Get Your Kicks On) Route 66 (Nat King Cole)
28.Holiday Road (Lindsey Buckingham)
29.Roam (B52s)
30.The Load Out (Jackson Browne)
31.Promised Land (Elvis Presley)
32.Rosalita (Bruce Springsteen)
33.Free and Easy Down the Road I Go (Dierks Bentley)


34.Heading for the Light (Traveling Wilburys)

35.Cruisin’ (Smokey Robinson)

36.Rockin’ Down the Highway (Doobie Brothers)
37.Who Wouldn’t Want to be Me (Keith Urban)
38.Graceland (Paul Simon)
39.No Particular Place to Go (Chuck Berry)
40.Every Day is a Winding Road (Sheryl Crow)
41.Here I Go Again (Whitesnake)
42.Going to California (Led Zeppelin)
43.Drivin’ My Life Away (Eddie Rabbit)


44.Six Days on the Road (Dave Dudley)
45.Runnin’ Down a Dream (Tom Petty) 
46.200 More Miles (Cowboy Junkies)
47.Take the Long Way Home (Supertramp)
48.Road Trippin’ (Red Hot Chili Peppers)
49.Darlington County (Bruce Springsteen)
50.Goin’ Up the Country (Canned Heat)
51.Wanted Dead or Alive (Bon Jovi)
52.America (Simon & Garfunkel)
53.Two of Us (The Beatles)
54.Running on Empty (Jackson Browne)
55.The Way (Fastball)


56.Here I Go Again (Whitesnake)
57.Get Out the Map (Indigo Girls)
58.Roll on Down the Highway (Bachman Turner Overdrive)
59.Goin’ Mobile (The Who)
60.Goin’ Down the Road Feeling Bad (The Grateful Dead)
61.Roll Me Away (Bob Seger)
62.Me and You and a Dog Named Boo (Lobo)
63.Jersey to O.C. (Sam Shaber)
64.This Land is Your Land (Woody Guthrie)
65.Ease on Down the Road (Michael Jackson/Diana Ross)
66.Movin’ Right Along (The Muppets)




11 BEST BOOKS COMPILED FROM 11 “TOP 100” LISTS

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There have been a number of “100 best books” lists over the years. But what happens when you amalgamate those lists to select the books regarded as the best of the best? One enterprising reader (posting online under the name Scerakor) accepted the challenge.

He (she?) chose 11 such lists—from sources as varied as Time, Entertainment Weekly, Goodreads, Modern Library and Reddit—and compared them to find the most recommended books among the top-100 lists. Since today is November 11th—11/11—I thought it might be interesting to look at the 11 most cited books among the 11 lists.


The top three (appearing on 10 of 11 lists):
1.Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
2.Lolita (Vladimir Nabokov)
3.The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald)


The next four (appearing on 9 of 11 lists):
4.The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
5.The Sound and the Fury (William Faulkner)
6.Invisible Man (Ralph Ellison)
7.Slaughterhouse-Five (Kurt Vonnegut)


And the next four (appearing on 8 of 11 lists):
8.To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
9.The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
10.Beloved (Toni Morrison)
11.1984 (George Orwell)

So that’s the top 11 from the 11 top-books lists. Interesting, right? One book, Ernest Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises, appeared on seven of the lists. Another 14 books found their way onto six of the lists:

*Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
*On the Road (Jack Kerouac)
*The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (Mark Twain)
*Gone With the Wind (Margaret Mitchell)
*Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
*An American Tragedy (Theodore Dreiser)
*Midnight’s Children (Salman Rushdie)
*My Antonia (Willa Cather)
*The Heart is a Lonely Hunter (Carson McCullers)
*The Tropic of Cancer (Henry Miller)
*Their Eyes Were Watching God (Zora Neale Hurston)
*To the Lighthouse (Virginia Woolf)
*Ulysses (James Joyce)

Oh, and one more: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams), which at least lends a somewhat contemporary quality to what is largely an old-school inventory.


If I may just inject my opinion for a moment… How in the heck do three of the 11 lists leave out To Kill a Mockingbird? That should almost be automatic disqualification. Discard those three lists. They don’t even merit scrutiny. Of course, that was the only novel Harper Lee ever published. But I also find it fascinating that, among the 26 books above, no author has more than a single book ranked among the best of the best. Apparently, Animal Farm (Orwell), The Old Man and the Sea (Hemingway) and Mrs. Dalloway (Woolf) just missed, showing up on 5 of the 11 lists. But what about Tom Sawyer? Or one of my favorites, Cannery Row?

There were in fact, two-dozen books that earned mention on 5 of the 11 lists—everything from Crime and Punishment to Pride and Prejudice, from Heart of Darkness to Light in August, from Fahrenheit 451 to 100 Years of Solitude, from The Call of the Wild to The Age of Innocence, and from Lord of the Flies to The Lord of the Rings. Incidentally, The Hobbit made four of the lists. John Irving’s The World According to Garp appeared on five lists, too, but only 2 of the 11 top-100 lists included my other favorite by that prodigious talent, A Prayer for Owen Meany.


And, of course, the original 11 lists ranked the best novels ever written. Many of the finest books ever produced—Roots, The Right Stuff, Blue Highways—fall under the category of creative nonfiction. But that’s another list for another time.

12 MOONWALKERS AND THEIR BOOKS

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Only a dozen men have walked on the moon. It is, perhaps, the ultimate in elite accomplishment. Someday, certainly, a thirteenth Earthling will follow in their dusty gray footsteps, but it won’t be a surprise performance. So everyone should know these 12 names. They should be taught in schools—beyond Neil Armstrong. I’m not saying every elementary school student should be as enamored with space minutia as I am. I’m not saying Tom Wolfe’s The Right Stuff should be a required part of the curriculum, right alongside To Kill A Mockingbird and Tom Sawyer. I’m just saying this: If we’re going to insist that kids learn, say, the seven inert gases, then we may as well teach them the names of the 12 men who are the only people to have left footprints beyond Earth.

So to facilitate that education for all of us, we at the Why Not 100 offer a reading list: Twelve books written by or about the 12 men who have touched the moon.

Here they are, in chronological order of their moon moment:

Neil Armstrong


Armstrong commanded Apollo 11, which landed on the moon surface on July 20, 1969. In the long run, his name may actually outshine the George Washingtons and Nelson Mandelas of the world. The sociopolitical map of the world will evolve over the epochs, making even U.S. origins and South African apartheid remnants of a vague, academic history. But Armstrong, who shied away from the spotlight until his death in 2012 at age 82, will always be the first man to step on the surface of another heavenly body.  
                 
First Man: The Life of Neil A. Armstrong by James R. Hansen

From a Booklist review:

For the first time, the cool, precise, and celebrity-averse Neil Armstrong has authorized a biography. Its readers cannot expect any more access to his emotional interior than the first man to walk on the moon has ever allowed, but they will learn about everything he achieved in aerospace engineering. Deflecting aerospace historian Hansen's inquiries about personal crises, such as the death of an infant daughter or his divorce, Armstrong proves disarmingly more voluble about his involvement with airplanes and spacecraft. Quelling apocrypha circulated at the time of Apollo 11 about the all-American boy who dreamed of going to the moon, Hansen follows the empirical arc of Armstrong's interest in aviation, his engineering studies at Purdue University, and his qualification as an aircraft-carrier pilot. After the Korean War, Armstrong resumed his engineering career, wrote technical papers, flew hotshot planes like the X-15, and stepped irrevocably into history with Apollo 11. Dramatizing the mission in meticulous detail, Hansen capably captures both Armstrong's expertise and his Garbo-like demurral of fame.

Buzz Aldrin


The lunar module pilot for Apollo 11 has long been the most visible of the moonwalkers, as willing to court celebrity as Armstrong was keen to avoid it. The second man to walk on the moon, he has done everything from authoring several books and lecturing worldwide to starting a company devoted to promoting his vision for the future of space exploration. Oh, and he competed on “Dancing With the Stars.”

Magnificent Desolation: The Long Journey Home from the Moon by Buzz Aldrin with Ken Abraham

From a Publishers Weekly review:

Picking up the threads of his acclaimed 1973 autobiography, Return to Earth, Aldrin presents as no-holds-barred account of how his celebrity, career and human weaknesses nearly destroyed his life… Millions witnessed Neil Armstrong and Aldrin become the first two people on the moon; an instant American hero, Aldrin was "greeted with ticker-tape parades" and spent the next two years, along with his fellow astronauts, as public relations assets for NASA and the Nixon administration. With a PhD from MIT, Aldrin had not only spent eight years training for the mission, but also helped developed technology needed for the mission; upon returning home from his world tour as an "unofficial space ambassador," however, he found the doors at NASA "pretty much closed"; the moon-landing program had given way to the shuttle project. That homecoming would catapult Aldrin into a decades-long struggle with alcoholism and clinical depression (both his grandfather and mother committed suicide) that broke up two marriages before psychiatric treatment and rehab put him on the road to recovery. This inspiring story exhibits Aldrin as a different, perfectly human kind of hero, giving readers a sympathetic look at a man eclipsed by his own legend.

Charles “Pete” Conrad


My favorite astronaut, and the third man to step on the moon as commander of Apollo 12 in December 1969. He was dyslexic as a child. He stood only 5-foot-6. He was the merry prankster among the Mercury-Gemini-Apollo crews. When he died tragically in motorcycle accident at age 69 in 1999, he—like many astronauts before him, was honored with a tree in the Astronaut Grove at Johnson Space Center. But Conrad often said, reflecting his personality, “If you can’t be good, be colorful.” So during the holiday season, when the rest of the astronaut trees are adorned in white lights, Conrad’s shines bright red.

Rocketman: Astronaut Pete Conrad's Incredible Ride to the Moon and Beyond by Nancy Conrad and Howard Klausner.

From a Booklist review:

The late astronaut Pete Conrad had a distinguished record and a wide streak of cowboy in him. This biography by his widow and screenwriter Klausner draws on their recorded interviews with Conrad, the last completed just before his accidental death, and does him as much justice as possible. The scion of a Main Line Philadelphia family ruined by the Depression, Conrad paid for flying lessons by working at airports and went to Princeton on a navy scholarship. Highly rated as a test pilot, he walked out of the original Mercury selection process because he disliked the tests and the doctors. He returned to fly two Gemini missions, command Apollo XII (the second moon landing), and command and repair, on the spot, Skylab during its first mission.

Alan Bean


The Apollo 12 lunar module pilot spent more than a day on the surface of the moon with Pete Conrad, his commander and good buddy. Since his retirement from NASA in 1981, he has turned his rare glimpse of space exploration into an artist’s rendering of the wonder of it all. Bean is a painter. He almost exclusively paints astronauts and space scenes, sometimes sprinkling his work with a smidge of moon dust.

Apollo : An Eyewitness Account by Alan Bean and Andrew Chaikin
            
From a Publishers Weekly review:

With the descent of the lunar lander Intrepid, Apollo 12 astronaut Bean became the fourth man to walk on the moon. Since his retirement from NASA in 1981, Bean has devoted himself to his realist paintings; this handsome volume allows him to display both his artistic skills and his orbital experience, reproducing dozens of Bean's paintings of lunar surfaces, moonwalks, astronaut gear and so on, alongside a blow-by-blow narrative of Apollo 12, which Chaikin (The National Air and Space Museum Book of Aviation and Space Flight) has written very much from Bean's perspective. Chaikin and Bean describe the thrills and setbacks on the latter's path from naval aviator to astronaut, his first view of the blue-and-white Earth from 293,000 miles and the technical problems of making sure an American flag stays up on the moon. Final chapters track Bean's adventures with the paint and canvas he took up in 1974 ("Flying skills are so much like painting skills, it's amazing"), the exploits and close calls of other astronauts and Bean's hopes for his art and for space exploration. Short paragraphs in which Bean explains his pictures' subjects and techniques alternate with the longer segments of narrative; this format can make the whole book seem scattered, though the images, and the anecdotes, retain undeniable power. The meticulously detailed paintings themselves add warmth and a mid-19th-century softness to the photos and equipment on which many of them are based. 

Alan Shepard

The first American in space (aboard Freedom 7 on May 5, 1971) and the fifth man to walk on the moon (as commander of Apollo 14 in 1971), Shepard would be on the Mount Rushmore of U.S. astronauts, probably alongside Armstrong, Aldrin and John Glenn. He was the first one of theose four to leave this Earth permanently, dying of leukemia in 1998. He was also the first and only one of them to play golf on the moon, famously one-handing a ball into space during his time on the lunar surface.

Moon Shot: The Inside Story of America's Apollo Moon Landings by Alan Shepard, Deke Slayton, Jay Barbee, and Howard Benedict

From a Booklist review:

It's hard to believe, but most teens and people in their early twenties don't remember Americans walking on the moon. This book, written lovingly by two of the most respected astronauts in U.S. history, will remedy that. Journalists Jay Barbree and Howard Benedict organized the material, and they portray Shepard and Slayton as two close friends who shared the dream of many children of the 1960s: to fly in outer space. Sadly, Shepard, after becoming the first American in space in a mere hour's trip, developed inner ear problems that prevented him from going back, and Slayton's irregular heartbeat kept him from going at all. Meanwhile, President Kennedy escalated the space race to get a leg up on the Russians. Despite covering some of the same ground as Tom Wolfe's The Right Stuff, Shepard and Slayton vividly portray the great bond uniting the original Mercury Seven. The most terrifying chapter describes the fire on the launchpad that killed three Apollo 1 astronauts, but problems on many flights (unbeknownst to TV viewers) were only solved by the skill of the astronauts as pilots.

Edgar Mitchell


He’s the mystic among the moonwalkers. The Apollo 14 lunar module pilot spent more than 216 hours in space with Shepard and came home with a yen to pursue the study of consciousness, founding the Institute of Noetic Sciences. His book is very much a reflection of that. As the flap copy states: He was engulfed by a profound sense of universal connectedness. He intuitively sensed that his presence and that of the planet in the window were all part of a deliberate, universal process and that the glittering cosmos itself was in some way conscious. The experience was so overwhelming, Mitchell knew his life would never be the same.

The Way of the Explorer: An Apollo Astronaut's Journey Through the Material and Mystical Worlds by Edgar Mitchell and Dwight Williams

From a Publishers Weekly review:

Among authors trying to bridge the gap between science and spirit, former astronaut Mitchell brings unique credentials. Originally scheduled for the ill-fated Apollo 13 mission, Mitchell, as told in this smooth blend of autobiography and exegesis, journeyed to the Moon in 1971 (and generated great controversy over ESP experiments he conducted on the flight). As he gazed on Earth, surrounded by blackness and an unfathomable number of stars, he experienced "an overwhelming sense of universal connectedness" that was to change his life. Within a few years, he had left NASA and founded the Institute of Noetic Sciences, aimed at the systematic study of the nature of consciousness. At the institute, he came to some fascinating conclusions, detailed here and based on principles of resonance, regarding a possible natural explanation for psychic powers.

David Scott

The commander of Apollo 15, Dave Scott and his lunar module pilot, Jim Irwin, were the first people to drive a lunar rover along the surface of the moon. Having served aboard Gemini 8 in 1966 and Apollo 9 in 1969, Scott eventually totaled 546 hours and 54 minutes in space. Later, he served as director of NASA’s Dryden Flight Research Center at Edwards Air Force Base. His fascinating book chronicles the space race—from both sides—and with a foreword by Neil Armstrong and an introduction by Tom Hanks.

Two Sides of the Moon: Our Story of the Cold War Space Race by David Scott and Alexei Leonov
                  
From Tom Hanks’s introduction:

Leonov and Scott have gone to extra lengths to explain the inexplicable in Two Sides of the Moon. And thank goodness they have. Theirs was a gamble taken voluntarily and eagerly with the single-minded pursuit of earning the assignment and then getting the job done. Sometimes they were first. Often they were best. Always they were colorful. And yet each time they returned, neither man claimed to have come back a changed man who had gone into space and seen the spirit of the universe. They came back from their missions in space having seen the spirit of themselves as even more of the human beings they were before leaving our world of air, land, and water…. Leonov, the artist and Scott, the engineer/dreamer. The two of them-the Cheaters of Death.

James Irwin


Irwin was the first of the moonwalkers to pass away, succumbing to a heart attack at age 61 in 1991. Apollo 15 marked his first and only voyage into space, during which he collected more than 170 pounds of moon rocks in 1971. He left NASA soon after to become a preacher, forming a religious organization called High Flight Foundation and actually leading several expeditions to Turkey’s Mount Ararat in search of another iconic vessel—Noah’s Ark.

Destination Moon: The Spiritual and Scientific Voyage of the Eighth Man to Walk on the Moon by James Irwin

Here’s how one Amazon.com reviewer described Irwin’s 52-page book:

With amazing storytelling craft, James Irwin recounts his physical and spiritual journey to the moon and back. I was hooked from the first line of the prologue: "When you lean far back and look up, you can see the Earth like a beautiful, fragile Christmas tree ornament hanging against the blackness of space. It's as if you can reach out and hold it in your hand."

John Young


Young led the fifth manned moon landing mission, Apollo 16, in April 1972, when he and Charlie Duke collected 200 pounds of moon rocks and drove more than 16 miles in the lunar rover. Before that, he served on Gemini 3, Gemini 10, and Apollo 10, which orbited the moon in 1969, but did not land. He also flew two space shuttle missions, logging a whopping 835 hours in space.

Forever Young: A Life of Adventure in Air and Space by John W. Young with James R. Hansen

From the publisher’s description:

He walked on the Moon. He flew six space missions in three different programs--more than any other human. He served with NASA for more than four decades. His peers called him the "astronaut's astronaut." Enthusiasts of space exploration have long waited for John Young to tell the story of his two Gemini flights, his two Apollo missions, the first-ever Space Shuttle flight, and the first Spacelab mission. Forever Young delivers all that and more: Young's personal journey from engineering graduate to fighter pilot, to test pilot, to astronaut, to high NASA official, to clear-headed predictor of the fate of Planet Earth.

Charles Duke


A retired brigadier general in the U.S. Air Force, Duke joined NASA in 1966 and served as the lunar module pilot on Apollo 16 six years later, before retiring from NASA in 1975. He and Young deployed a cosmic ray detector and an ultraviolet camera on the lunar surface. He later went on to found organizations ranging from an investment firm called Charlie Duke Enterprises to the Duke Ministry for Christ.

Moonwalker : The True Story of an Astronaut Who Found that the Moon Wasn't High Enough to Satisfy His Desire for Success by Charlie Duke and Dotty Duke

From an Amazon.com review:

Charlie Duke does a nice job of telling his story from a small town in South Carolina to the surface of the Moon and back again. Duke does an admirable job of telling the story the way it happened. Knowing of his "born-again" status, I was unsure how Duke would tell the story. He is refreshingly honest about the toll the astronaut years took on his family and marriage. Only when he finds Christianity does the issue enter the book. I was pleased, as often people who find religion tend to color the facts of their life previous to their conversion in terms of how they feel later. Certainly not a tell-all book, Duke seems to have a genuine like for those he works, and ultimately travels to the moon, with. If you are looking for a book that deals with the "everyman" who was fortunate enough to be chosen to visit the Moon, then "Moonwalker" is for you.

Eugene Cernan


Gene Cernan was the 11th man to walk on the moon, and he likes to say that he was actually the last man to set foot on it as well. The Apollo 17 commander made two space flights (Gemini 9 and Apollo 10) before reaching the moon on the sixth and final lunar landing mission in December 1972. He and lunar module pilot Harrison Schmitt spend more than three days on lunar surface, and his moonprints were the last—so far.

The Last Man on the Moon: Astronaut Eugene Cernan and America's Race in Space by Eugene Cernan and Donald A. Davis

From Publishers Weekly

Gemini and Apollo astronaut Cernan, helped by Davis (A Father's Rage, etc.), takes readers with him on one great space adventure after another, including Gemini 9's "Spacewalk from Hell," Apollo 1's fire, Snoopy's hair-raising swoop by the lunar surface. Readers experience the agony of life-or-death decision making in the Apollo 13 control room, exult with Cernan and geologist Jack Schmitt throughout the mission of Apollo 17 and meet legendary characters of the astronaut corps and the technical and political leaders who shared their glory. Cernan reveals the risk-taking, competitive personality and oversized self-confidence that drove his success as a test pilot and astronaut. He also acknowledges his failings as a husband to his first wife, Barbara, whom he presents as a quiet, strong homefront heroine who always found the right words in public despite her private difficulties.

Harrison “Jack” Schmitt


He can call himself the last man to set foot on the moon for the first time. Schmitt was a trained geologist, the only moonwalker without military experience. But he helped train all of the astronauts in geology. Apollo 17 was his only space flight, but he continued to work at NASA after the Apollo program as chief of the scientist-astronauts and then as NASA Assistant Administrator for Energy Programs. In 1975, he ran for election in the U.S. Senate in the state of New Mexico, where he won as a Republican and served a six-year term.

Return to the Moon: Exploration, Enterprise, and Energy in the Human Settlement of Space by Harrison Schmitt

From the publisher:

Former NASA Astronaut Harrison Schmitt advocates a private, investor-based approach to returning humans to the Moon—to extract Helium 3 for energy production, to use the Moon as a platform for science and manufacturing, and to establish permanent human colonies there in a kind of stepping stone community on the way to deeper space. With governments playing a supporting role—just as they have in the development of modern commercial aeronautics and agricultural production—Schmitt believes that a fundamentally private enterprise is the only type of organization capable of sustaining such an effort and, eventually, even making it pay off.

So there you have it—12 very different men (celebrities and seekers, geologists and generals) and a dozen books offering insight into the astronauts who boldly ventured where no man had gone before and where, unfortunately, no one has gone since.




4 NOVELS WRITTEN BY THE GERBER BABY

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November 20th is Ann Turner Cook’s 88th birthday. But she’ll always be four months old.

Back in 1927, she was about the same age as the daughter of Dorothy and Daniel Gerber, who produced a line of canned fruits and vegetables at the Fremont Canning Company in Michigan. Tired of hand-straining solid foods for her daughter, Dorothy suggested to Daniel that the work could easily be done at the plant. By late the next year, her suggestion bore fruit in the form of strained prunes, peas, carrots and spinach—the first Gerber Baby Foods line.

After discovering that the Gerbers were seeking a baby’s face as part of a national advertising campaign, artist Dorothy Hope Smith, who specialized in drawing children, submitted a simple charcoal sketch. She told them she could finish the sketch if it were accepted. The Gerber execs told her not to change a thing. By 1931, the popular drawing was the official Gerber trademark (the original sketch is kept in a vault at the company’s headquarters). Its subject—Ann Turner’s parents were friends of the artist—was en route to becoming America’s best-known baby.

I had a very pleasant phone conversation with Cook about a decade-and-a-half ago for a magazine article that I was writing about the origins of iconic logos—you know, the Nike swoosh and the Michelin Man and the NBC peacock. The Gerber Baby is as iconic as any of them. “I don’t take credit,” Cook told me. “I think all babies are adorable. The artist just captured that look that people love.”


Over the years, rumors pinned the baby’s identity on a number of celebrities – from Elizabeth Taylor to Humphrey Bogart to Bob Dole. After the court case, in 1950, after a woman actually sued Gerber (complaining that her child’s likeness was being used), the company asked Cook to sign some papers making it clear that she was, indeed, their beloved baby. She was compensated for the use of her likeness. No baby food was involved, but it was enough money to allow Cook and her new husband to make a down payment on their first house and car.

Then Cook became an English teacher—a beloved teacher for more than a quarter-century. But when she retired in her native Florida, she decided what she really wanted to do was write. So nearly nine decades after bursting upon the scene as the ultimate child star, the Gerber Baby is now a member of the Mystery Writers of America. She is the author of a series of novels set on Florida’s Gulf Coast and featuring Brandy O’Bannon, a reporter and amateur sleuth. Picture Agatha Christie selling strained carrots.



Cook has published four books through iUniverse—one for each month in the age of the Gerber Baby. Here are the opening lines of each of them:



1.Trace Their Shadows (2001)
Brandy O’Bannon looked up at the dormer windows, shrouded in Spanish moss, not because she believed in ghosts—she was open-minded on the question—but because a good ghosts story could save her job on the paper.







2.Shadow Over Cedar Key (2003)
Allison did not think about death when she arrived in Cedar Key, only about the approaching storm. Tense and shaking, she carried her little girl from the car through the wind and rain and up the cabin steps. But the hurricane was not what she feared most.





3.Homosassa Shadows (2005)
Brandy O’Bannon sat a Tiki bar, watching the wide Homosassa River glide past, its black waters shimmering under the outdoor lights. She nursed a margarita and toyed with a crab cake, reluctant to return to the rented house alone. Tomorrow was Thursday, the official beginning of her vacation, but it promised to be a solitary one.



4.Micanopy in Shadow (2008)
Ada turned her young face toward the unfamiliar dirt road. It stretched straight before her in the chill October afternoon. After a quarter of a mile, it curved to the right. Two hours ago its oak canopy seemed protective. Now in the fading light, the branches arched above her, darker and more sinister. The only sound was the murmur of leaves. She clenched her fists, stifled a final sob, and strode forward.



89 BEST INDIE BOOKSTORE NAMES

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Never judge a book by its cover, but how about a bookstore? Shouldn’t a repository of creativity boast a creative name of its own?

Sure, practicality has its place. But it can become… commonplace. There are stores out there—or least at last check in these volatile times, there were stores out there—named The Book Barn (Leavenworth, KS), Book Stop (Hood River, OR), Book Cove (Pawling, NY), Book Mine (Leadville, CO), Book Vine (Cherokee, IA), Book Parlor (Burns, OR), Book Vault (Oskaloosa, AL), Book Shelf (Winona, MN), Book Bin (Onley, VA), and Book Nook (Brenham, TX). Not to mention Bookin’ It (Little Falls, N) and Books to be Red (Ocracoke, NC) and Bookends (Ridgewood, NJ) and BookNest (Blairtown, NJ). Oh, and Books and Cookies (Santa Monica, CA).

Of course, you’ll also find references like Page One Bookstore (Albuequerque, NM), Turning Pages (Natchez, MS), The Next Page (Frisco, CO), and Back Pages Books (Waltham, MA). You’ll come across Chapter One (in both Ketchum, ID and Hamilton, MT), The Second Story (Laramie, WY), The Golden Notebook (Woodstock, NY) and Summer’s Stories (Kendallville, IN). There’s a Reader’s Loft (Green Way, WI), a Reader’s Corner (Louisville, KY) and a Literary Bookpost (Salisbury, NC). There’s a Country Bookseller in Wolfebore, NH. And a Country Bookshop in charming Southern Pines, NC. And a Country Bookshelf in Bozeman, MT.

If practicality or reading references aren’t the aim, proprietors of the published often hope to convey a certain charm, a sense of whimsy. Animal references are a common source, particularly for children’s bookstores. There’s a Nightbird Books (Denver, CO), Mockingbird Books (Seattle, WA), The Raven Book Store (Lawrence, NY), Toadstool Bookshop (Milford, NH), Turtle Town Books (Nisswa, MN), Beagle Books (Park Rapids, MN), even Pegasus Books (Oakland, CA). Colors, too, are popular—the more incongruous the better. Blue Willow Bookshop (Houston, TX). Blue Bicycle Books (Charleston, SC). Yellow Umbrella Books (Chatham, MA). White Birch Books (North Conway, NH).

Or you just combine the color and the creature: Blue Manatee (Cincinnati, OH)

Those are all fine establishments—and we at the Why Not 100 say support your local independent bookstore, whatever the name! But the following happen to be our 89 favorite names for indie outlets:

1.Crazy Wisdom (Ann Arbor, MI)
2.Tome on the Range (Las Vegas, NM)
3.Iconoclast Books (Ketchum, ID)
4.Women and Children First (Chicago, IL)
5.Present Tense (Batavia, NY)


6.Wild Rumpus (Minneapolis, MN)
7.The Elephant’s Trunk Children’s Bookshop (Lexington, MA)
8.Hooray for Books! (Alexandria, VA)
9.A Whale of  Tale Children’s Bookshoppe (Irvine, CA)
10.Monkey See, Monkey Do (Clarence, NY)


11.The Voracious Reader (Larchmont, NY)
12.Dragonwings Bookstore (Waupaca, WI)
13.WordsWorth Books (Little Rock, AR)
14.Between the Covers (Telluride, CO and Harbor Springs, MI)
15.Where the Sidewalk Ends Books (Chatham, MA)
16.Eight Cousins (Falmouth, MA)
17.Yellow Book Road (Point Loma, CA)
18.The Story Emporium (Pawtucket, RI)
19.The Briar Patch (Bangor, ME)
20.Jaberwocky Bookshop (Newburyport, MA)


21.Wit and Whimsy (Marblehead, MA)
22.Centuries and Sleuths (Forest Park, IL)
23.Page and Palette (Fairhope, AL)
24.Politics & Prose (Washington, D.C.)
25.Fact & Fiction (Missoula, MT)
26.Breathe Books (Baltimore, MD)
27.Tattered Cover Bookstore (Denver, CO)
28.Inquiring Minds (Saugerties, NY)
29.Greetings and Readings (Hunt Valley, MD)
30.Bunch of Grapes Bookstore (Vineyard Haven, MA)


31.CoffeeTree Books (Morehead, KY)
32.Paragraphs Bookstore (Mount Vernon, OH)
33.Novel Ideas (Baileys Harbor, WI)
34.LaDeDa Books & Beans (Manitowoc, WI)
35.Booklovers Gourmet (Webster, MA)
36.The Velveteen Rabbit (Fort Atkinson, WI)
37.Moby Dickens Bookshop (Taos, NM)
38.Storybook Cove (Hanover, MA)
39.Sustenance Books (Murphys, CA)
40.The Flying Pig Bookstore (Shelburne, VT)


41.Learned Owl Bookshop (Hudson, OH)
42.Pooh’s Corner (Grand Rapids, MI)
43.Off the Beaten Path (Steamboat Springs, CO)
44.Town Crier Bookstore (Emporia, KS)
45.Common Good Books (St. Paul, MN)
46.The Open Door Bookstore (Schenectady, NY)
47.Subterranean Books (St. Louis, MO)
48.Alphabet Soup (Seattle, WA)
49.Four-Eyed Frog Books (Gualala, CA)
50.Maloprop’s Bookstore (Asheville, NC)


51.The Twig Book Shop (San Antonio, TX)
52.The King’s English Bookshop (Salt Lake City, UT)
53.Big Blue Marble Bookstore (Philadelphia, PA)
54.Kids Ink (Indianapolis, IN)
55.Read Between the Lynes (Woodstock, IL)
56.A Room of One’s Own (Madison, WI)
57.Spellbound Children’s Bookshop (Asheville, NC)
58.Big Hat Books (Indianpolis, IN)
59.Rainy Day Books (Fairway, KS)
60.Humpus Bumpus Books (Cumming, GA)


61.Nonesuch Books (South Portland, ME)
62.The Hickory Stick Bookshop (Washington, CT)
63.The Frugal Frigate (Redlands, CA)
64.The Magic Tree Bookstore (Oak Park, IL)
65.Red Balloon Bookshop (St. Paul, MN)
66.The Honey Bee (Cincinnati, OH)
67.Duck’s Cottage (Duck, NC)
68.Other Tiger (Westerly, RI)
69.Reading Reptile (Kansas City, MO)
70.Oblong Books (Millerton, NY)


71.Inklings Bookshop (Yakima, WA)
72.Storyopolis (Studio City, CA)
73.Bramble Bookstore (Viroqua, WI)
74.The Muse Bookshop (Deland, FL)
75.Yawn’s Books (Canton, GA)
76.Gum Tree Bookstore (Tupelo, MS)
77.Covered Treasures Bookstore (Monument, CO)
78.Booky Joint (Mammoth Lakes, CA)
79.Hicklebee’s (San Jose, CA)
80.The Spotty Dog (Hudson, NY)
81.Percy’s Burrow (Auburn, ME)
82.Quarter Moon Books (Topsail Beach, NC)
83.Pomegranate Books (Wilmington, NC)
84.Mysterious Galaxy Books (Redondo Beach, CA)
85.Wind and Tide Bookshop (Oak Harbor, WA)
86.Full Circle Bookstore (Oklahoma City, OK)
87.Browseabout Books (Rehoboth Beach, DE)
88.Rediscovered Bookshop (Boise, ID)
89.Viva! Bookstore (San Antonio, TX)


79 SEUSS-IMAGINED INVENTIONS

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Leonard Da Vinci. Alexander Graham Bell. Thomas Edison. Dr. Seuss. Really, has anyone been more inventive?

Consider the evil Once-ler in The Lorax, who stays in his Lerkim on top of his store, tells his story via a Whisper-Ma-Phone (his whispers coming down through a snergelly hose) and makes his own clothes out of miff-muffered moof. What exactly is a Lerkim or miff-muffered moff? How does a Whisper-Ma-Phone work? Does it matter?

Or how about little Cat Z from The Cat in the Hat Comes Back, who removes his tiny hat to release VOOM, an unexplained bit of clean-up magic.  Or a Zans (good for opening cans, according to One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish). Or Oobleck, the green, gummy goo that falls from the sky in the Kingdom of Didd. Or mile after mile of the Lorax’s beautiful Truffula Trees—“The touch of their tufts was much softer than silk. And they had the sweet smell of fresh butterfly milk.” Unfortunately, the soft tufts can be knitted into Thneeds (a Fine-Something-That-All-People-Need), which sells for $3.98.

So in the tradition of the good doctor, we at the Why Not 100 have created a store of sorts that sells imagination. We’re stocking it with a collection of 79 creations that can only be found (and named) in the pages of Dr. Seuss—from natural phenomena (Stickle-bush trees) and nutrients (Glunker Stew) to instruments (Three-Nozzled Bloozer) and ammunition (Kick-a-Doo Powder). We’ve even categorized them for you:

TOOLS AND PARTS
1.Whisper-Ma-Phone (The Lorax)
2.Audio Telly O-Tally O-Count (Dr. Seuss’s Sleep Book)
3.Star-Off Machine (The Sneetches)


4.Zans (One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish)
5.Thinker-Upper (The Glunk that got Thunk)
6.Un-Thinker (The Glunk that got Thunk)
7.Wamel (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
8.Faddle (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
9.Throm-dim-bu-lator (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
10.Gick (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
11.Goor (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
12.Skrux (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
13.Snux (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
14.Snoor (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
15.Borfin (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)
16.Super-Axe-Hacker (The Lorax)


WEAPONS AND AMMUNITION
17.Utterly Sputter (The Butter Battle Book)
18.Eight-Nozzled Elephant-Toted Boom Blitz (The Butter Battle Book)
19.Jigger-Rock Snatchem (The Butter Battle Book)
20.Bitsy Big-Boy Boomero (The Butter Battle Book)
21.Snick-Berry-Switch (The Butter Battle Book)
22.Kick-a-Doo Powder (The Butter Battle Book)
23.Moo-Lacka-Moo (The Butter Battle Book)
24.Triple-Sling-Jigger (The Butter Battle Book)


VEHICLES
25.One-Wheeler Wubble (I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew)
26.Happy Way Bus (I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew)
27.Abrasion-Contusions (If I Ran the Circus)
28.Roller-Skate-Skis (If I Ran the Circus)
29.Ga-Zoom (Marvin K. Mooney, Will You Please Go Now!)
30.Zike Bike (Marvin K. Mooney, Will You Please Go Now!)
31.Zumble Zay (Marvin K. Mooney, Will You Please Go Now!)
32.Bumble Boat (Marvin K. Mooney, Will You Please Go Now!)
33.Crunk Car (Marvin K. Mooney, Will You Please Go Now!)


INSTRUMENTS
34.Welcoming Horn (If I Ran the Circus)
35.Three-Nozzled Bloozer (If I Ran the Circus)
36.One-nozzled Noozer (If I Ran the Circus)
37.Poogle-Horn (Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?)

NATURE
38.Oobleck (Bartholomew Cubbins and the Oobleck)
39.Pants eating plants (Do You Know How Lucky You Are?)
40.Grickle –grass (The Lorax)
41.Snide (What Was I Scared Of?)
42.Brickel Bush (What Was I Scared Of?)
43.Tutt-a-Tutt Tree (You’re Only Old Once)
44.Dike Trees (The King’s Stilts)
45.Stickle-bush Trees (If I Ran the Circus)
46.Truffula Trees (The Lorax)


FOOD
47.Beezle-nut juice (Horton Hears a Who)
48.Dried-fried clam chowder (The Butter Battle Book)
49.Moose-moss (Thidwick the Big-Hearted Moose)
50.Caviar Soufflé (You’re Only Old Once)
51.Pemmican Patties (You’re Only Old Once)
52.Terrapin Toast (You’re Only Old Once)
53.Glunker Stew (The Glunk that got Thunk)
54.Who-pudding (How the Grinch Stole Christmas)
55.Who-hash (How the Grinch Stole Christmas)
56.Who-roast-beast (How the Grinch Stole Christmas)


MEDICINE
57.Optoglymics (You’re Only Old Once)
58.Nooronetics (You’re Only Old Once)
59.Bus Driver’s Blight (You’re Only Old Once)
60.Chimney Sweep Stupor (You’re Only Old Once)
61.Prune-pickers Plight (You’re Only Old Once)
62.Internal Organ Olympics (You’re Only Old Once)
63.Wuff-Whiffer (You’re Only Old Once)
64.Sniff-Scan (You’re Only Old Once)
65.Loganberry-colored pills (You’re Only Old Once)
66.Eyesight and Solvency Test (You’re Only Old Once)


OTHER STUFF
67.Thneed (The Lorax)
68.Miff-muffered moof (The Lorax)
69.Snuvv (The Lorax)
70.Gruvvulous Glove (The Lorax)
71.Lerkim (The Lorax)
72.Gluppity-Glupp (The Lorax)
73.Schloppity-Schlopp (The Lorax)
74.Glunk (The Glunk that got Thunk)
75.Jivvanese (Do You Know How Lucky You Are?)
76.Dooklas (Do You Know How Lucky You Are?)
77.Gizz (Do You Know How Lucky You Are?)
78.Schlopp (Oh, The Thinks You Can Think)
79.Voom (The Cat in the Hat Comes Back)



14 MOST EXPENSIVE BOOKS EVER PURCHASED

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How much would you pay for a first edition of a classic book? Fifty dollars? Maybe $100? How about several million bucks?  What follows is a list of the 14 highest known prices paid for manuscripts and books.
The first 13 largely represent iconic and ancient texts, although the Declaration of Independence and the Federalist Papers didn’t quite make the list. And there are certainly classics among them, including works by Chaucer and Shakespeare, although original copies of Don Quixote and Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland didn’t quite make the cut either. 
But the 14th book? That was auctioned off on December 13, 2007. And it may surprise you: 
1) $30.8 million—Codex Leicester
This collection of largely scientific writings by Leonardo da Vinci was named after Thomas Coke, the Earl of Leicester, who purchased it in 1719. The 72-page original document is considered perhaps the most famous of his 30 journals, covering topics as varied as why fossils can be found in mountains and why the moon is luminous. Bill Gates bought it at Christie’s auction house in 1994. He had its pages scanned into digital image files, some of which were later offered as screen savers.

2) $21.3 million—Magna Carta
In an attempt to limit the King of England’s powers, proclaiming that his will was not arbitrary, the feudal barons of England created this 13th-century document, which got the ball rolling toward the rule of constitutional law. Important stuff. And expensive stuff (in 2007)—especially for what is believed to be a copy of a copy. 
3) $14.3 million—St. Cuthbert Gospel
This tiny 7th-century pocket gospel, written in Latin and the earliest surviving intact European book, was placed in St. Cuthbert’s coffin. But it was removed to England’s Durham Cathedral in 1104 and then passed to various collectors over the centuries, eventually landing at Stonyhurst College in Lancashire. The British Library had it on long-term loan for a generation before officially purchasing it in 2012. 



4) $14.165 million—Bay Psalm Book
This was the first book printed in what is now the United States—in 1640 in Cambridge, Massachusetts, just 20 years after the pilgrims landed. Eleven known copies exist and can be found at places like Harvard, Yale, the New York Public Library, and the Library of Congress. One of them, now located at the Rosenbach Museum & Library, was once stolen in 1949 by a UCLA student as part of a fraternity initiation. American financier David Rubenstein spent the $14.165 million (a record for a printed book) for a copy previously owned by Boston’s Old South Church. 

5)  $13.4 million—Rothschild Prayerbook
This is an illuminated manuscript from the early 16th century, containing 254 folios by a number of leading Flemish miniaturists. It was the property of princes and counts in its first century, then its whereabouts for a few hundred years are unknown until it reappeared in a collection owned by the Viennese branch of the Rothschild family. The family sold the book at Christie’s auction house in 1999, and the price remains a world-record for an illuminated manuscript. 

6) $11.7 million—Gospels of Henry the Lion
A 12th-century masterpiece of Romanesque book illumination, probably created around 1175 at the Benedictine Helmarshausen Abbey, it was purchased in 1983 by money raised by the German government and private donors. Until Bill Gates emptied his pockets in 1994 for the topper on this list, it was the most expensive book in the world. I like this part: It is kept in the Herzog August Bibliotek in Wolfenbuttel. For security reasons, it is displayed only once every two years. 


7) $11.5 million—The Birds of America
Written and illustrated by naturalist James Audubon himself from 1827-38 and one of only 119 complete copies known to have survived, it includes images of six birds that have since become extinct. This one was purchased by a London-based art dealer in 2010. But several copies of The Birds of America have fetched jaw-dropping prices, including: 

8) $8.8 million—The Birds of America
Sheikh Saud Al-Thani of Qatar purchased this one at Christie’s in 2000. 

9) $7.9 million—The Birds of America
In January 2012, this copy was purchased at Christie’s by a buyer identified as only “an American collector who bid by phone.” 


10) $7.5 million—The Canterbury Tales
Only a dozen copies of the 1477 first edition of Geoffrey Chaucer’s classic are known to exist, and this was the last version in private hands. It was purchased at auction by a couple of London book dealers in 1998. The auctioned copy was originally bought the first Earl Fitzwilliam—for six pounds. 

11) $6.16 million—Shakespeare’s “First Folio”
One pound was the original price for Mr.  William Shakespeare’s Comedies, Histories & Tragedies (as it was called), the 1623 published collection of Shakespeare’s plays. About 750 copies were believed to have been printed. Fewer than one-third of those still exist, although 82 of them can be found in the Folger Shakespeare Library in Washington, D.C. This particular copy sold at auction in 2001. 

12) $4.9 million—Gutenberg Bible
The first major book printed with movable type in the West, ushering in the age of the printed book, a 15th-century literary icon—yet it’s only 12th on this list. Forty-eight copies are known to have survived, only 21 of them complete. This price was fetched in 1987, but it has been estimated the value of a complete copy today is $25-35 million.  



13) $4.5 million—Traite des arbres fruiiers (Treatise on Fruit Trees)
This five-volume set of illustrations and text by Henri Louis Duhamel du Monceau (and illustrated by Pierre jean Francois Turpin and Pierre Antoine Poiteau) was sold in 2006. No book ever written about fruit trees has fetched a higher price. 

14) $3.98 million—The Tales of Beedle the Bard
Yes, that’s right. Amid Shakespeare and Chaucer and da Vinci, we have J.K. Rowling’s mass-market offering. But lest you fear that it represents a sign of the apocalypse, consider the story: Rowling handwrote and illustrated seven original copies, giving six to friends and editors. In 2007, she put the seventh up for auction, and Amazon.com paid a smidge under $4 million for it, making it the most expensive modern manuscript ever purchased. Thankfully, the money was donated to a charity called The Children’s Voice. 





87 MEMORABLE LAST LINES OF NOVELS

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The closing lines of My Mantelpiece, the memoirs of civil rights icon Carolyn Goodman (published by Why Not Books in 2014), reflect a woman’s relentless pursuit of social conscience and her realization that the job is never done. In the twilight of her life, as she looked back on life lessons amid tragedy and triumph, Dr. Goodman recalled the following:

I once asked a question of a slightly younger friend: “What do you during the day?”
“Nothing,” she told me, offering a few minor examples that bolstered her statement. “What’s there to do?”
What’s there to do? I would always wonder instead: Is there time to do everything?

Last lines are final impressions. The cherry on top. The words that linger. Given that his month marks the 75thanniversary of the premiere of the film Gone with the Wind, closing lines are very much on my mind. What follows are some of the best:

1. "He loved Big Brother." (1984 by George Orwell)

2. "I got to light out for the Territory ahead of the rest, because Aunt Sally she's going to adopt me and sivilize me, and I can't stand it. I been there before." (Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain)

3. “Eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it. The river was cut by the world's great flood and runs over rocks from the basement of time. On some of the rocks are timeless raindrops. Under the rocks are the words, and some of the words are theirs. 
I am haunted by waters.” (A River Runs Through It by Norman Maclean)

4. “From here on in I rag nobody.” (Bang the Drum Slowly by Mark Harris)

5. “Tomorrow, I’ll think of some way to get him back. After all, tomorrow is another day.” (Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell)


6. "Max stepped into his private boat and waved goodbye and sailed back over a year and in and out of weeks and through a day and into the night of his very own room where he found his supper waiting for him—and it was still hot." (Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak)

7. "There is grandeur in this view of life, with its several powers, having been originally breathed by the Creator into a few forms or into one; and that, whilst this planet has gone cycling on according to the fixed law of gravity, from so simple a beginning endless forms most beautiful and most wonderful have been, and are being evolved." (Origin of Species by Charles Darwin)

8. “For though he was master of the world, he was not quite sure what to do next. But he would think of something.” (2001: A Space Odyssey by Arthur C. Clarke)

9. “Then I went back into the house and wrote, It is midnight. The rain is beating on the windows. It was not midnight. It was not raining.” (Molloyby Samuel Beckett)

10. "So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past." (The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald)

11. " Now I know they were the forces that contributed to our illusion of Owen's weightlessness: they were the forces we didn't have the faith to feel, they were the forces we failed to believe in—and they were also lifting up Owen Meany, taking him out of our hands. O God—please give him back! I shall keep asking You." (A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving)

12. "Then our mother came in, and she said to us two, 'Did you have any fun? Tell me. What did you do?’ And Sally and I did not know what to say. Should we tell her the things that went on there that day? Well...what would YOU do If your mother asked you?" (The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss)

13. “He drew a deep breath. ‘Well, I’m back,’ he said. (The Lord of the Ringsby J.R.R. Tolkien)

14. "It's funny. Don’t ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody." (The Catcher in the Rye byJ.D. Salinger)

15. "The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which." (Animal Farm by George Orwell)



16. "But the years came and went without bringing the careless boy; and when they met again Wendy was a married woman, and Peter was no more to her than a little dust in the box in which she had kept her toys." (Peter and Wendy by J.M. Barrie)

17. “If I were a younger man, I would write a history of human stupidity; and I would climb to the top of Mount McCabe and lie down on my back with my history for a pillow; and I would take from the ground some of the blue-white poison that makes statues of men; and I would make a statue of myself, lying on my back, grinning horribly, and thumbing my nose at You Know Who.” (Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut)

18. "But wherever they go, and whatever happens to them on the way, in that enchanted place on the top of the Forest a little boy and his Bear will always be playing." (The House At Pooh Corner byA.A. Milne)

19. "A LAST NOTE FROM YOUR NARRATOR. I am haunted by humans." (The Book Thief by Markus Zusak)

20. "He was soon borne away by the waves and lost in darkness and distance." (Frankenstein by Mary Shelley)

21. “The women tell me that after all these years I haven’t even found myself. Of course, I haven’t looked all that hard yet.” (The Right Madness by James Crumley)

22. "'Rest assured, our father, rest assured. The land is not to be sold.' But over the old man's head they looked at each other and smiled." (The Good Earth byPearl S. Buck)

23. "This stone is entirely blank. The only thought in cutting it was of the essentials of the grave, and there was no other care than to make this stone long enough and narrow enough to cover a man. No name can be read there." (Les Miserables by Victor Hugo)

24. "The offing was barred by a black bank of clouds, and the tranquil waterway leading to the utmost ends of the earth flowed somber under an overcast sky—seemed to lead into the heart of an immense darkness." (Heart of Darkness byJoseph Conrad)

25. "But I don't think us feel old at all. And us so happy. Matter of fact, I think this the youngest us ever felt." (The Color Purple by Alice Walker)


26. “I do so like green eggs and ham. Thank you, thank you, Sam I Am.” (Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss)

27. "She looked up and across the barn, and her lips came together and smiled mysteriously." (The Grapes of Wrath byJohn Steinbeck)

28. "P.S. please if you get a chanse put some flowrs on Algernons grave in the bak.” (Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes)

29. “Who knows but that, on the lower frequencies, I speak for you? (Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison)

30. "The eyes and faces all turned themselves towards me, and guiding myself by them, as by a magical thread, I stepped into the room." (The Bell Jar bySylvia Plath)

31. "Whatever our struggles and triumphs, however we may suffer them, all too soon they bleed into a wash, just like watery ink on paper." (Memoirs of a Geisha byArthur Golden)

32. "He is coming, and I am here." (The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger)

33. He stayed that way for a long time and when he aroused himself and again looked out of the car window, the town of Winesburg had disappeared and his life there had become but a background on which to paint the dreams of his manhood.” (Winesburg, Ohio by Sherwood Anderson)

34. "I'm fine. I have bad dreams, but I never saw Mister Duck again. I play video games. I smoke a little dope. I got my thousand-yard stare. I carry a lot of scars. I like the way that sounds. I carry a lot of scars." (The Beach by Alex Garland)

35. "The old man was dreaming about the lions." (The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway)



36. “’Yes,’ I said. ‘Isn’t it pretty to think so?’” (The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway)

37. Columbus, too, thought he was a flop, probably, when they sent him back in chains. Which didn’t prove there was no America.” (The Adventures of Augie March by Saul Bellow)

38. “And it may be that love sometimes occurs without pain or misery.” (The Shipping News by Annie Proulx)

39. "I ran with the wind blowing in my face, and a smile as wide as the valley of Panjsher on my lips. I ran." (The Kite Runner byKhaled Hosseini)

40. "For all to be accomplished, for me to feel less lonely, all that remained to hope was that on the day of my execution there should be a huge crowd of spectators and that they should greet me with howls of execration." (The Stranger by Albert Camus)

41. "Curley and Carlson looked after them. And Carlson said, 'Now what the hell ya suppose is eatin' them two guys?'" (Of Mice and Men byJohn Steinbeck)

42. "But this is how Paris was in the early days when we were very poor and very happy." (A Moveable Feast byErnest Hemingway)

43. “’The woman,’ Dillard whispered. ‘The woman. They saw he missed that whore.” (Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry)

44. “But the face on the pillow, rosy in the firelight, is certainly that of Clarice Starling, and she sleeps deeply, sweetly, in the silence of the lambs.” (Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris)

45. “Before reaching the final line, however, he had already understood that he would never leave that room, for it was foreseen that the city of mirrors (or mirages) would be wiped out by the wind and exiled from the memory of men at the precise moment when Aureliano Babilonia would finish deciphering the parchments, and that everything written on them was unrepeatable since time immemorial and forever more, because races condemned to one hundred years of solitude did not have a second opportunity on earth.” (One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez)

46. “But in the world according to Garp, we are all terminal cases.” (The World According to Garp by John Irving)


47. “It is a far better thing that I do, then I have ever done; it is a far, far better place that I go to than I have ever known.” (A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens)

48. "Poor Crabbin. Poor all of us when you come to think of it." (The Third Man by Graham Greene)

49. “I don’t hate it he thought, panting in the cold air, the iron New England dark; I don’t. I don’t! I don’t hate it! I don’t hate it!” (Absalom! Absalom! by William Faulkner)

50. “She was seventy-five and she was going to make some changes in her life.” (The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen)

51. “At the time he had no messages for anyone. Nothing. Not a single word.” (Herzog by Saul Bellow)

52. "He had fallen forward and lay on the earth as though sleeping. Turning him over one saw that he could not have suffered long; his face had an expression of calm, as though almost glad the end had come." (All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque)

53. “The bitch is dead now.” (Casino Royale by Ian Fleming)

54. "My name is Salmon, like the fish. First name: Susie. I was here for a moment, and then I was gone. I wish you all, a long, and happy life." (The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold)

55. "He turned out the light and went into Jem's room. He would be there all night, and he would be there when Jem waked up in the morning." (To Kill a Mockingbird byHarper Lee)

56. "For Siddalee Walker, the need to understand has passed, at least for the moment. All that was left was love and wonder." (Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood byRebecca Wells)

57. "It is not often that someone comes along who is a true friend and a good writer. Charlotte was both." (Charlotte's Web by E.B. White)


58. "We sat there for a long time, till the crowd around us thinned, till the sun shifted and the light changed. Till we felt our eyes could meet again, without the tears." (Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay)

59. "It was the devious-cruising Rachel, that in her retracing search after her missing children, only found another orphan." (Moby Dick by Herman Melville)

60. “We walked up the stairs together, and once we were inside, I handed him the pages of this book.” (Leviathan by Paul Auster)

61. "Yes, they will trample me underfoot, the numbers marching one two three, four hundred million five hundred six, reducing me to specks of voiceless dust, just as, in all good time, they will trample my son who is not my son, and his son who will not be his, and his who will not be his, until the thousand and first generation, until a thousand and one midnights have bestowed their terrible gifts and a thousand and one children have died, because it is the privilege and the curse of midnight’s children to be both masters and victims of their times, to forsake privacy and be sucked into the annihilating whirlpool of the multitudes, and to be unable to live or die in peace." (Midnight's Children bySalman Rushdie)

62. "'God's in his heaven, all’s right with the world,' whispered Anne softly." (Anne of Green Gables byLucy Maud Montgomery)

63. “Everything had gone right with me since he had died, but how I wished there existed someone to whom I could say that I was sorry.” (The Quiet Americanby Graham Greene)

64. "’What book?’ Arthur paused. ‘The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy,’ he said at last. ‘What's that?’ ‘Oh, just something I threw into the river this evening. I don't think I'll be wanting it anymore,’ said Arthur Dent.” (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams)

65. "Here was peace. She pulled in her horizon like a great fish-net. Pulled it from around the waist of the world and draped it over her shoulder. So much of life in its meshes! She called in her soul to come and see." (Their Eyes were Watching God by Nora Zeale Hurston)

66. "But the naming game involves only male names, because if it's a girl, Laila has already named her." (A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini)

67. "And so farewell from your little droog. And to all others in this story profound shooms of lip-music brrrrr. And they can kiss my sharries. But you, O my brothers, remember sometimes thy little Alex that was. Amen. And all that cal." (A Clockwork Orange byAnthony Burgess)


68. "She opened the door wide and let him into her life again." (The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest by Stieg Larsson)

69. “They smelled of moss in your hand. Polished and muscular and torsional. On their back were vermiculate patterns that were maps of the world in its becoming. Maps and mazes. Of a thing which could not be put back. Not be made right again.” (The Road by Cormac McCarthy)

70. "Oh, my girls, however long you may live, I never can wish you a greater happiness than this." (Little Women byLouisa May Alcott)

71. His body jolted backward, jolted the floorboards, and Ella Mae Waterson screamed, but Robert Ford only looked at the ceiling, the light going out of his eyes before he could say the right words.” (The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford by Ron Hansen)

72. “Maybe I will go to Paris. Who knows? But I’ll sure as hell never go back to Texas again.” (The Final Country by James Crumley)

73. “One day one of their number would write a book about all this, but none of them would believe it, because none of them would remember it that way.” (The Thin Red Line by James Jones)

74. “The knife came down, missing him by inches, and he took off.” (Catch-22by Joseph Heller)

75. "'From the Land of Oz,' said Dorothy gravely. 'And here is Toto, too. And oh, Aunt Em! I'm so glad to be at home again!'" (The Wonderful Wizard of Oz byL. Frank Baum)

76. "The scar had not pained Harry for nineteen years. All was well." (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling)

77. “Then starting home, he walked toward the trees, and under them, leaving behind the big sky, the whisper of wind voices in the wind-bent wheat.” (In Cold Blood by Truman Capote)


78. "And then, while the pretty brunette girl finished singing her verse, he buzzed me through like I was someone who mattered." (The Devil Wears Prada by Lauren Weisberger)

79. “Evil was vanquished forever. Or so they thought. But hidden in a small cave on Shadow Island was one black egg. It was just beginning to crack.” (DragonValleyby Luke Herzog)

80. "He turned away to give them time to pull themselves together; and waited, allowing his eyes to rest on the trim cruiser in the distance." (Lord of the Flies byWilliam Golding)

81. “I been away a long time.” (One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey)

82. “This was not judgment day, only morning. Morning: excellent and fair.” (Sophie’s Choice by William Styron)

83. “And at the instant he knew, he ceased to know.” (Martin Eden by Jack London)

84.  “An excellent year’s progress.” (Bridget Jones’s Diary by Helen Fielding)

85. ''I never saw any of them again—except the cops. No way has yet been invented to say goodbye to them." (The Long Goodbye by Raymond Chandler)

86. “Now vee may perhaps to begin. Yes?” (Portnoy’s Complaint by Phillip Roth)

87. “P.S. Sorry I forgot to give you the mayonnaise.” (Trout Fishing in America by Richard Brautigan)




32 NERDY NUMBERS FROM A CENSUS OF MIDDLE-EARTH

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J.R.R. Tolkien would be turning 123 years old this week—he was born on January 3, 1892. Were he alive now, he would be oldest human ever, but he would still fall eight years short of Bilbo Baggins’s hobbit record. Maybe you’re a Tolkienphile, and you knew that. Actually, I knew that, too. Tolkien’s books are what inspired me to become a writer. My oldest son’s middle name is “Balin.” I named my dog “Pippin.”

But there are J.R.R. Tolkien fans, and then there is Emil Johansson.

A Swedish chemical engineering student, Johansson first read The Lord of the Rings in 2000. A dozen years later, he published a website that he called the Lord of the Rings Project. He generally shortens it to LotrProject. That’s about all he does halfway.


His website includes perhaps the most extensive genealogy of Middle-Earth, including family trees for, well, just about everybody. Want to know if the dwarves Balin and Oin are distant cousins? Just look it up. And there is a historical timeline of… everything. When did the city of Gondolin fall in the First Age? When were the Rings of Power created in the Second Age? When did Boromir set off for Rivendell in the Third Age? It’s there.


There’s even a Periodic Table of Middle Earth. And a map of the routes taken by each member of the Fellowship of the Ring. Want to know how long far Frodo and Sam traveled each day? Check it out. Johansson may know more about the comings and goings of Gandalf and Gollum than most Civil War historians know about the travels of Robert E. Lee. Really, I’m not kidding.


Perhaps most remarkable is Johansson’s census of Middle-Earth. Basically, he went through Tolkien’s books—The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings trilogy, and the epic tales in The Silmarillion—and he took note of every named character. All of them. And then he crunched the numbers—about race and sex and life expectancy and population.



All I’ve done is travel through the site and pick out some of his most interesting findings. If you’ve only seen the movies—never read the books—then you may encounter some spoilers here. But really, if you’ve only seen the movies, you probably haven’t read this far. Here is a numerical trip through the geeked-out glory of Middle-Earth, divided into categories:

RACE AND SEX

1.Among the characters mentioned by name in Tolkien’s Middle-Earth, 474 are humans, 224 are hobbits, 98 are elves, and 52 are dwarves.

2.Only 18 percent of the total number of characters are female—not due to a lack of females in Middle-Earth but rather because Tolkien simply didn’t describe many of them.

3.However, 71 named hobbits—nearly one-third of all hobbits mentioned—are female.

4.Of the 14 “good” Valar—Tolkien’s version of the denizens of Mount Olympus—seven are male, and seven are female. There is a 15th—the male Morgoth, the source of all evil on Middle-Earth.

5.Although there is a disparaging reference to Gloin’s wife in the film The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, only one female dwarf is actually named in Tolkien’s books. She is Dis, the mother of Fili and Kili, the youngest warriors who were members of Thorin and Company.



LIFE EXPECTANCY

6.Elves live forever, unless killed, but Johansson figured the life span of a dwarf to be roughly 195 years—although that takes into account a rather small sample size and the fact that most of the dwarves mentioned in the books died in battle.

7.One of the original dwarves created—Durin the Deathless—lived to be nearly 2,400 years old.

8.Dwalin, brother of Balin and member of Thorin and Company, is the dwarf with the second-longest known life span—340 years.

9.At the time of their death during the Battle of the Five Armies, Fili (82) and Kili (77) were young by dwarven standards.

10.The dwarf with the shortest known life span, Fror, was slain by a dragon at age 37.

11.The life expectancy of men depends on one’s ancestry. Numenoreans and their descendants lived, on average, about 237 years. Other men averaged an 82-year life span.

12.At the time of The Fellowship of the Ring, Aragorn was—believe it or not—about 88 years old. He was the last of the Numenoreans and lived to be 210.

13.The oldest living man, Elros, lived to be 500 years old, but he was a half-elf who chose to be a man (his brother Elrond chose to be an elf and spent about 6,000 more years on Middle-Earth). Aside from Elros, twenty known men lived at least 300 years (a dozen exceeded 400 years).

14.There is one account of a human who lived only to the age of three—Lalaith, a girl who died during a plague.

15.Every line of kings of men—of Numenor, Gondor, Arnor, Arthedain, and the Dunedain—saw a decline in their life expectancy as the years passed

16.The second-longest life span of any hobbit in history was that of Bilbo Baggins himself, who was age 131 (one year older than Gerontius Took—the “Old Took”) when he sailed into the West.

17.Bilbo didn’t even approach the age of the oldest hobbit. That would be Smeagol—aka Gollum—who perished in Mount Doom at the age of 589.


POPULATION

18.Not surprisingly, the highest-known population of Middle-Earth—judging only by the described characters in Tolkien’s books—occurred at the end of the Third Age, during the events described in The Lord of the Rings.

19.The second-highest-known population era peaked around the year 500, at the end of the First Age, just before the Wars of Beleriand and the Great Battle.

20.The first man is mentioned about halfway through the First Age.

21.Feanor, considered perhaps the mightiest of all elves of Middle-Earth, had seven sons.

22.The hobbit who fathered the most children? That would be Sam Gamgee. Samwise and his wife (the former Rose Cotton), had 13 children. And Sam was one of six children himself.


DISTANCE TRAVELED

23.In The Hobbit, the approximate distance traveled by Bilbo and his companions to Rivendell was 397 miles. It took them 38 days to get there.

24.They rested in Rivendell for 23 days.

25.Bilbo and his companions trekked another 457 miles to the Halls of Thranduil (the Elven King in Mirkwood Forest). It took them another 54 days to get there.

26.By far the fastest they moved during that span of time was 58 miles in one day.

27.Another 81 days later, they finally arrived at the Lonely Mountain—although that included only six days of actual travel.

28.In The Lord of the Rings, Frodo and his three hobbit pals traveled a longer route to Rivendell (458 miles). But they made it there faster (27 days).

29.They rested in Rivendell for a whopping 64 days.

30.Then they traveled another 464 miles to Lothlorien. Including their excitement in the Mines of Moria, that trek took them another 27 days.

31.They stayed in Lorien for 30 days.

32.Frodo and Sam had to travel another 880 miles (some of it with their Fellowship companions). It took them 37 days to reach Mount Doom.



57 THINGS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT SHERLOCK HOLMES (AND HIS CREATOR)

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One of the goals of the Why Not 100 is to clue literature lovers in to facts they might have missed. Sort of the way Sherlock Holmes did. Sure, you’re probably aware that Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s books were told from Dr. John Watson’s point of view, that Holmes lived at 221B Baker Street, and even that Holmes was addicted to cocaine and morphine. But did you know...
  1. He was this close to being called “Sherringford” Holmes.
  2. Dr. Watson was originally named “Ormand Sacker.”
  3. While Holmes and Watson are generally considered to be—and portrayed—as middle-aged, they were actually in their late twenties for most of their adventures.
  4. Among Conan Doyle’s inspirations for the character was Edgar Allen Poe’s fictional detective C. Auguste Dupin.
  5. Not once in any of the Conan Doyle stories did Holmes ever utter the exact words “Elementary, my dear Watson.” He said, “Elementary.” And he said, “My dear Watson.” But never together.

  6. The phrase was actually first known to be used in a 1915 P.G. Wodehouse novel called Psmith, Journalist (which was actually first serialized in 1909).
  7. The first well-documented time that Holmes uttered the phrase was in the 1929 film The Return of Sherlock Holmes.
  8. Clive Brook, the British actor who said the line, played Holmes in two subsequent movies.
  9. In fact, Holmes only says “elementary” seven times in all of Doyle’s works.
  10. A Study in Scarlet was the first story to feature the mystery-solving Sherlock Holmes character. It had been rejected by many publishers and originally appeared in a Christmas book, Beeton’s Christmas Annual, in 1887.
  11. Conan Doyle was paid 25 pounds for it.
  12. It was a bit of a commercial flop.
  13. The author wrote the story at age 27. It took him three weeks to finish it.
  14. At a dinner party in 1889, Conan Doyle was convinced by Lippincott’s Monthly Magazine editor Joseph Stoddard to serialize a second Sherlock Holmes novel, which became The Sign of Four.
  15. Oscar Wilde was also at the party and was also convinced to serialize a novel—his only novel, The Picture of Dorian Gray.
  16. It wasn’t until the Sherlock Holmes stories began to appear in The Strand Magazine that they became a global sensation. The magazine continued to publish the stories for more than four decades.
  17. Conan Doyle based much of Holmes on one of his professors, Dr. Joseph Bell.
  18. He was said to have based Holmes’s nemesis, Professor James Moriarty, on a fellow named Adam Worth.
  19. Conan Doyle was a doctor. He studied medicine at the University of Edinburgh and wrote stories during study breaks.
  20. After graduating from medical school, he served a stint as a ship’s doctor. He went on a voyage to West Africa.
  21. Conan Doyle was also an amateur sleuth who, like Holmes, once helped free two men who were wrongly charged with murder.
  22. He was a good athlete who, after he became famous, played goalkeeper for a soccer team under a pseudonym.
  23. One of Conan Doyle’s pals was iconic American magician Harry Houdini.
  24. Holmes wasn’t perfect (witness the morphine addiction), and neither was the man who created him. In the well-known story “The Speckled Band,” a doctor trains a snake to kill at the sound of a whistle. Snakes are deaf.
  25. Sherlock Holmes has appeared in at least 226 different films.
  26. There also have been two musicals, as well as a ballet called “The Great Detective.”
  27. Basil Rathbone starred as Holmes in 14 films between 1939 and 1946. He became frustrated at being typecast.
  28. Five of the actors who played Holmes on stage or screen were better known for playing General Patton, Moses, James Bond, J.R. Ewing, and Iron Man.
  29. In fact, among the scores of actors who have played Holmes—besides the above George S. Scott, Charlton Heston, Roger Moore, Larry Hagman, and Robert Downey, Jr.—are John Cleese, Peter O’Toole, Michael Caine, Christopher Plummer, John Gielgud, Peter Lawford, Frank Langella, John Barrymore, Christopher Lee, and Benedict Cumberbatch
  30. Christopher Lee also played Sherlock’s brother, Mycroft, in a film. 
  31. Martin Freeman (Bilbo Baggins in The Hobbit films) plays Dr. Watson opposite Cumberbatch’s Sherlock Holmes in Sherlock, the TV series. Cumberbatch was also the voice of Smaug in The Hobbit.
  32. The show films its Baker Street scenes about a half-mile away from Baker Street.
  33. The series pilot was titled “A Study in Pink.”
  34. In that show, unlike in the books, the characters don’t refer to one another by their surnames. They call each other “Sherlock” and “John.”
     
  35. Both Mr. Spock from Star Trek(Leonard Nimoy) and Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation (Brent Spiner) have appeared as Sherlock Holmes.
  36. Oh, and you can add Peter Cushing (Grand Moff Tarkin) from Star Wars to the list, too.
  37. The only fictional character who has appeared in more films is Count Dracula.
  38. Holmes has also appeared on postage stamps all around the world, including the United Kingdom, Canada, South Africa, Nicaragua and San Marino.
  39. The official address of the Sherlock Holmes Museum in London is 221B Baker Street.
  40. It actually sits between buildings at 237 and 241 Baker Street, making it unofficially 239 Baker Street.
  41. From 1932 to 2002, Abbey National occupied the 221B Baker Street address, eventually employing a secretary to handle the correspondence that arrived from all over the world.
  42. Though Holmes is so often portrayed wearing a deerstalker hat, he really only wore it while visiting the rural countryside during his investigations.
  43. It has been estimated that more than 40,000 fan-fiction versions of Sherlock Holmes stories have been created.
  44. Although the vast majority of Sherlock Holmes stories (four novels and 56 short stories in all) were narrated by Dr. Watson, two of them—“The Adventure of the Blanched Soldier” and “The Adventure of the Lion’s Mane”—were told by Holmes himself.
  45. Two other stories—“The Adventure of the Mazarin Stone” and “His Last Bow”—were written in the third person.
  46. Sherlock Holmes first appeared on film in the year 1900—in a minute-long story titled “Sherlock Holmes Baffled.”
  47. In an effort to get closer to a villain whom he is trying to expose in “The Adventures of Charles Augustus Milverton,” Holmes becomes engaged to a housemaid. After he solves the case, he simply leaves her.
  48. In “The Adventure of the Dying Detective,” he tricks Dr. Watson into thinking he is dying of a deadly disease. Why? Because he doesn’t think his best friend would be able to keep the secret that he’s faking it.
  49. Toward the end of his life, Arthur Conan Doyle became a spiritualist who attempted to use a medium to contact long dead friends and family members.
  50. Aside from his detective stories, Conan Doyle published everything from poetry to historical novels to a series of books about the British during World War I.
  51. Winston Churchill was a big fan of his historical novels.
  52. Conan Doyle also published a 1912 book called The Lost World about dinosaurs still alive on an island. Sound familiar?
  53. It inspired Michael Chrichton’s Jurassic Park and Steven Spielberg’s film sequel to it, which he called The Lost World.
  54. Arthur Conan Doyle became Sir Arthur Conan Doyle—that is, he was knighted—not for his fiction, but for his journalistic work during the Second Boer War.
  55. Six years after Holmes’s first appearance, Conan Doyle actually killed him off in a story called The Final Problem.
  56. His readers protested, so eight years later he brought him back in “The Hound of the Baskersvilles.” The period in between is known as “The Great Hiatus.”
  57. Conan Doyle once said, “If in one hundred years I am known only as the man who invented Sherlock Holmes, then I will have considered my life a failure.”


63 PEOPLE WITH PEN NAMES

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There was a boy in the early 18thcentury who was a bit of a precocious writer. As a 16-year-old, he attempted to write for The New-England Courant, one of the first newspapers in the American colonies. The Courant had been founded by his older brother, who rebuffed his younger sibling’s attempts at publication. So the teenager adopted an alias. Under the name Silence Dogood, ostensibly a middle-aged widow, he wrote a series of well-received, tongue-in-cheek letters to the newspaper—essays, really. It was his first taste of some measure of fame, albeit under a pseudonym.

A quarter-century later, by which time he had become a famous author, he hoped to draw attention to the injustice of blaming women only when children were born out of wedlock (something with which he was well familiar). So he dressed in female literary garb once more, publishing “The Speech of Polly Baker” in an issue of The Gentleman’s Magazine. He also wrote letters to The American Weekly under the names Caelia Shortface and Martha Careful, as well as a gossip column under the name Alice Addertongue.

So what was his real name? Benjamin Franklin. January 17th is his birthday. Happy birthday, Silence Dogood.

Ben Franklin was not the last famous writer to opt for a literary disguise, of course. Either they later became famous using their real names or they were already famous before adopting a pseudonym. 

Here’s a list of two-dozen-plus-one and their less-famous pen names: 

1. Ben Franklin (Silence Dogood, Polly Baker, Alice Addertongue, Caelia Shortface, and Martha Careful)

2. Charles Dickens (Boz)

3. Stephen King (Richard Bachman)

4. J.K. Rowling (Robert Galbraith, Newt Scamander and Kennilworthy Whisp)

5. Agatha Christie (Maty Westmacott)

6. Ray Bradbury (Douglas Spaulding)

7. Anton Chekhov (Antosha Chekhonte)

8. Vladimir Nabokov (Vladimir Sirin)

9. L. Frank Baum (Edith Van Dyne)


10. Louisa May Alcott (A.M. Barnard)

11. Isaac Asimov (Paul French)

12. Nora Roberts (J.D. Robb)

13. Michael Chrichton (John Lange)

14. C.S. Lewis (Clive Hamilton and N.W. Clerk)

15. Dean Koontz (Richard Paige, John Hill, Brian Coffey, David Axton, Anthony North, Owen West, Aaron Wolfe, K.R. Dwyer and Deanna Dwyer)

16. William S. Burroughs (William Lee)

17. Washington Irving (Jonathan Oldstyle, Diedrich Knickerbocker and Geoffrey Crayon)


18. Charlotte Bronte (Currer Bell)

19. Emily Bronte (Ellis Bell)

20. Anne Bronte (Acton Bell)

21. Gore Vidal (Edgar Box)

22. John Hughes (Edmond Dantes)

23. Harry Turtledove (H.N. Turtletaub)

24. Ann Rule (Andy Stack)

25. Lawrence Block (William Ard, Ben Christopher, Lee Duncan, Chip Harrison, Paul Kavanagh, Sheldon Lord, Andrew Shaw, B.L. Lawrence, John Warren Wells, Jill Emerson and Anne Campbell Clarke)

Of course, there’s another side of the coin—pen names that are household names. Sure, Anne Rice could have been placed on the above list. She wrote erotic novels under the names Anne Rampling and A.N. Roquelaure. But she’s on the list below because her real name wasn’t Anne Rice at all. She was born Howard Allen O’Brien.


Actually, when you read the list below, it might begin to stagger your sense of reality. Ayn Rand, Mark Twain, Lewis Carroll, George Orwell, Woody Allen, Joseph Conrad, and Toni Morrison… all were fake names. Here a list of 38 such writers, everyone from Anne Rice to Ayn Rand to Ann Landers to Anonymous:


1. Mark Twain (Samuel Langhorne Clemens)

2. Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss and Theo LeSieg)

3. Lewis Carroll (Charles Lutwidge Dodgson)

4. George Orwell (Eric Arthur Blair)

5. Ayn Rand (Alisa Zinov'yevna Rosenbaum)

6. George Eliot (Mary Ann Evans)

7. Joseph Conrad (Jozef Teodor Konrad Korzeniowski)

8. Woody Allen (Allen Stewart Konigsberg)


9. Toni Morrison (Chloe Anthony Wofford)

10. Daniel Defoe (Daniel Foe)

11. Voltaire (Francois-Marie Arouet)

12. Moliere (Jean Baptiste Poquelin)

13. O. Henry (William Sydney Porter)

14. Lemony Snicket (Daniel Handler)

15. Stan Lee (Stanley Lieber)

16. Harold Robbins (Harold Rubin)

17. Anne Rice (Howard Allen O’Brien)

18. Erin Hunter (Kate Cary, Cherith Baldry and Victoria Holmes)

19. Ed McBain (Salvatore Lombino)

20. Ellery Queen (Frederic Dannay and Manfred B. Lee)

21. C.S. Forester (Cecil Smith)

22. Gabriela Mistral (Lucila de María del Perpetuo Socorro Godoy Alcayaga)

23. Ann Landers (Eppie Lederer)


24. Sidney Sheldon (Sidney Schectel)

25. Sue Denim (Dav Pilkey)

26. Robert Jordan (James Oliver Rigney, Jr.)

27. James Tiptree (Alice Bradley Sheldon)

28. Bartholomew Gill (Mark C. McGarrity)

29. Diablo Cody (Brook Busey)

30. Miranda James (Dean James)

31. George Sand (Amantine Lucile Aurore Dupin)

32. Christopher Pike (Kevin Christopher McFadden)

33. Isak Dinesen (Karen Blixen)

34. Robert O. Saber (Milton K. Ozaki)

35. Jean Barrett (Bob Rogers)

36. E.L. James (Erika Mitchell)

37. Anonymous (Joe Klein)





56 BAND NAMES BORROWED FROM LITERATURE

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There have been scores of songs about literature—from “Paperback Writer” to “Tom Sawyer” to “Holden Caulfield” (by a Newfoundland punk band named Mopey Mumble-Mouse). There have been albums, too. The Steve Miller Band’s third album, for instance, was called “Brave New World.” But the most profound paean to authorship is certainly naming your band after a book. So this installment of the Why Not 100 focuses on 56 of them.

On this list you’ll find bands named after book titles (from Steppenwolf to Supertramp), characters (from Dorian Gray to the Dead Milkmen), and various other literary references (from Mott the Hoople to the Ministry of Love). You’ll find Faulkner and Fitzgerald, Hesse and Huxley, Steinbeck and Salinger, Dahl and Dickens.

And we’re not even including Bob Dylan (Bobby Zimmerman chose the name in reference to poet Dylan Thomas) and Moby (electric dance music pioneer James Hall got his nickname from being a distant descendant of Herman Melville). Enjoy the bands:

BOOK TITLES

1. The Velvet Underground
Michael Leigh’s early ‘60s book about a secret sexual subculture became the name of the band co-founded by Lou Reed, managed by Andy Warhol, and eventually elected to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
2. Steppenwolf
The band that had late ’60s hits like “Born to be Wild” and “Magic Carpet Ride” took its name from the title of a book by German-Swiss author Herman Hesse. Before then, they called themselves The Sparrows.
3. Supertramp
They took their name from a 1908 book called The Autobiography of a Super-Tramp by Welsh writer W.H. Davies. They reached superstardom with their 1979 Breakfast in America album, which included “The Logical Song” and “Goodbye Stranger.”


4. Genesis
The Hall of Fame band (which included Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins and sold more than 150 million albums worldwide) recorded its first album in 1969. Befitting its Bible origins, the album was called From Genesis to Revelation.

5. Manhattan Transfer
The group, named for a 1925 John Dos Passos novel, has had several incarnations. Appropriately, perhaps, its biggest hit was a cover of “The Boy from New York City.”

6. New Riders of the Purple Sage
The original lineup of this country rock band, named after Zane Grey’s Riders of the Purple Sage, included a few members of the Grateful Dead.



7. Of Mice and Men
One of this California metal-core band’s founders, Austin Carlile, explained that he and co-founder Jaxin Hall “both had plans for life, and they got screwed up, so now we’re making the most of what we can.” Sort of like Steinbeck’s George and Lennie.

8. As I Lay Dying
Another metal-core band from California offering a nod to a classic novel, a title that William Faulkner took from a passage in The Odyssey. Another Faulkner novel, Pylon, inspired the name of an oft-reincarnated alternative rock band.

9. Paradise Lost
John Milton’s epic 17th-century poem inspired English heavy metal band Paradise Lost, and its first album, in 1989, was called “Lost Paradise.” To confuse matters more, there’s also an album called Paradise Lost by progressive metal band Symphony X.

10. The Brave New World
The psychedelic Seattle band, named after Aldous Huxley’s futuristic novel, survived from 1966-73. The indie rock band the Feelies is named after a fictional entertainment device in the book. And another Huxley novel, Eyeless in Gaza, is the name of an English musical duo.

11. Nine Stories
It was the title of J.D. Salinger’s collection of short stories, published in 1953, and Lisa Loeb’s first band, formed in 1990.

12. A Confederacy of Dunces
The band may or may not have been familiar with a passage in the book, when author John Kennedy Toole describes “a small band of young men” who “stood before the phonographs as if it were an altar.”

13. The Grapes of Wrath
The Canadian folk rock band formed in 1983, disbanded in 1992, and reformed in 2009. Supposedly, when they chose the name, none of the band members had actually read John Steinbeck’s book.



14. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
Hunter S. Thompson’s novel had a subtitle: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream. But the band (formed in 2008) is described as a “Japanese scream/digital hardcore” group.

15. Fear of Flying
A New York progressive rock band named after Erica Jong’s sexually-charged 1973 novel.

16. Ubik
It’s the name of a Seattle band and a 1969 sci-fi novel by Philip K. Dick, which critic Lev Grossman described as “a deeply unsettling existential horror story, a nightmare you’ll never be sure you’ve woken up from.”

17. Oryx and Crake
Margaret Atwood says her critically acclaimed 2003 post-apocalyptic novel is “speculative fiction.” The Atlanta band named after it has been described as “indie-rock” and “orchestral-pop.” Two songs “Oryx” and “Crake” also appears on a 2013 album by The Knife.

18. Soft Machine
These  British progressive rock pioneers took their name from a William Burroughs novel, published in 1961.

19. Blood Meridian
It’s a Canadian alternative country band named for Cormac McCarthy’s 1985 novel.

20. The Tommyknockers
Contemporary New Orleans rock-and-rollers named for Stephen King’s 1987 science fiction novel. It was also the name of a song by a German metal band.



21. The Devil Wears Prada
Things happen fast: In 2003, Lauren Weisberger had a bestselling chick lit novel. Two years later, it became the name of a Christian metal-core band.

22. Catch 22
What genre of music haven’t we touched upon? How about ska punk. The band was formed in 1996, 35 years after Joseph Heller published his classic novel.

23. Titus Andronicus
It’s unlikely that when William Shakespeare was writing his first tragedy, set during the last days of the Roman Empire, he thought it would someday be the name of a New Jersey punk rock band.

24. Hot Water Music
Another punk band, this one from Florida and now disbanded. The name came from the title of a 1983 collection of short stories by Charles Bukowski.

25. Wreck of the Hesperus
Incongruity? How about this being the name of a 19th-century narrative poem by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow and a 21st-century Irish doom metal band that put out an album called Eulogy for the Sewer Dwellers.

26. Marillion
There are literally dozens of bands named after J.R.R. Tolkien’s universe—bands with names like Angmar and Isengard, Rohan and Rivendell, Mirkwood and Mordor, Gandalf and Arwen, Sauron and Smaug. But the neo-progressive rock band Marillion—which originally called itself Silmarillion after Tolkien’s epic collection of stories from Middle Earth, but shortened it to avoid potential copyright issues—has put out 17 albums.


CHARACTERS

27. Big Brother and the Holding Company
They were named (by concert promoter Chet Helms) after George Orwell’s enigmatic dictator from 1984. When Janis Joplin joined as lead singer, their sound became bigger.

28. Uriah Heep
This seminal hard rock band of the ‘70s sold more than 40 million albums worldwide. In 1969, they changed their name from Spice to the name of a character from David Copperfield, in part because Charles Dickens was ubiquitous around Christmas that year.

29. Veruca Salt
The spoiled rich girl from Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factorybecame the name of a Chicago alternative rock band in 1993.

30. Holden Caulfield
J.D. Salinger’s rebellious teenager from The Catcher in the Rye is an icon of literature—and the namesake of a band with an album called The Art of Burning Bridges.

31. Dorian Gray
In Oscar Wilde’s only published novel, The Picture of Dorian Gray, the title character sells his soul so that only a painting of him ages, not the man himself. That’s one way to stay young. Or you can simply start a rock band named Dorian Gray—as two groups (one in Germany, one in Yugoslavia) did.

32. The Boo Radleys
The English alt-rock band of the 1990s—named for the reclusive and unforgettable character from Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird—had one top ten single called “Wake Up Boo!”



33. The Artful Dodger
The pickpocket from Dickens’s Oliver Twist lent his name to an American power rock band. Their second album was called Honor Among Thieves.

34. Augie March
An Australian pop rock band named after the protagonist in Saul Bellow’s The Adventures of Augie March.

35. Billy Pilgrim
An American folk rock duo based in Atlanta (not to be confused with art rock band Sweet Billy Pilgrim), named for the antihero of Kurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse-Five.

36. Fu Manchu
Discordance? How about a Southern California stoner rock band named after an enduring criminal genius from the early 20th century.

37. Weena Morloch
In H.G. Wells’s Time Machine, Weena is a love interest in the future, and the Morlocks are cannibalistic hominids. An electronic band combined the names.

38. The Dead Milkmen
Toni Morrison’s Song of Solomon featured a character known as Macon “Milkman” Dead III. The satirical punk rock band re-worked the name



39. Grace Pool
Alterna-folkies who took their name from a minor character in Charlotte Bronte’s Jane Eyre.

40. Benny Profane
A rock band from Liverpool! But short-lived. In Thomas Pynchon’s debut novel V, Profane is a discharged U.S. sailor with a sidekick named Pig Bodine. The band’s first song was called “Where is Pig?”

41. Fiver
Lost the Plot was the first album by Fiver, a pseudo-solo act (Simone Schmidt) named for the fictional rabbit from Richard Adams’s Watership Down.

42. The Ophelias
In “Hamlet,” William Shakespeare’s Ophelia is a noblewoman of Denmark. In San Francisco, the Ophelias put out three albums in the late ‘80s.

43. Oberon
A free-form Oklahoma band that writes songs about space—named after the duplicitous king of the faeries in Shakespeare’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream.” Go figure.

44. Frumious Bandersnatch
The 1960s psychedelic rock band (which later splintered into the Steve Miller Band and Journey) took its name from the frumious (adjective) Bandersnatch, a creature in Lewis Carroll’s nonsense poem “Jabberwocky” from Through the Looking-Glass.

45. The Mugwumps
According to William S. Burroughs in Naked Lunch, “Mugwumps have no liver and nourish themselves exclusively on sweets. Thin, purple-blue lips cover a razor sharp beak of black bone with which they frequently tear each other to shreds.” Sounds like a rock band, in this case a short-lived ‘60s version whose members later formed the Mamas & the Papas and the Lovin’ Spoonful.



REFERENCES

46. The Doors
In 1965, Jim Morrison and his mates chose to name themselves after Aldous Huxley’s book, Doors of Perception, about an afternoon mescaline trip. Huxley took his title from a line in a William Blake poem, “The Marriage of Heaven and Hell.”

47. Steely Dan
Something you may wish you didn’t know: These Hall of Fame rockers named themselves after a prominent sex toy in Naked Lunch.

48. Forty Nine Hudson
Jack Kerouac drove a 1949 Hudson cross country in his journey for On the Road. Forty Nine Hudson mixes acoustic strumming with bombastic rocking.

49. Ministry of Love
In George Orwell’s 1984, the Ministry of Love enforces loyalty through fear and brainwashing. The female-fronted Las Vegas punk-pop band just uses music.

50. Gatsby’s American Dream
This Seattle band has a lead vocalist named Nic Newsham, which would have been a great character name in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby.

51. Pooh Sticks
A Welsh indie pop band of the late ‘80s and early ‘90s, named for the dropping-sticks-from-a-bridge game, their song “I Know Someone Who Knows Someone Who Knows Alan McGee Quite Well” sounds like a declaration from the Hundred Acre Woods.



52. This Mortal Coil
Surely, when Shakespeare was writing this in “Hamlet”—“For in that sleep of death what dreams may come, when we have shuffled off this mortal coil”—he was envisioning a pop supergroup four centuries later.

53. Heaven 17
This new wave synth-pop band took its name from a fictional band mentioned in Anthony Burgess’s 1962 dystopian novella A Clockwork Orange.

54. Modest Mouse
In “The Mark on the Wall,” Virginia Woolf writes about “the minds of modest, mouse-colored people.” Modest Mouse’s frontman, Isaac Brock, said, “I chose the name when I was fifteen. I wanted something that was completely ambiguous.”

55. Mott the Hoople
The British rock band is best known for “All the Young Dudes,” written for them by David Bowie in 1972.  While in prison on a drug offense, record producer Guy Stevens read the novel Mott the Hoople by Willard Manus—about an eccentric who works in a circus freak show. It became the name of a band and its first album.

56. Love Craft
H.P. Lovecraft was an American horror fiction writer who only became famous posthumously, dying in poverty in 1937. But his work inspired songs and lyrics by the likes of Metallica and Black Sabbath. In 1967, a Chicago psychedelic rock band named itself H.P. Lovecraft and played haunting, eerie music inspired by his writings. They soon shortened the name to Lovecraft and eventually Love Craft.






48 WRITERS WHO ARE JOHNS

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Happy 60th birthday, John Grisham. What’s in a name? Sometimes, a whole pantheon.

Consider: If you’re an athlete, it’s tempting to want to be named Michael (Jordan, Phelps, Johnson, Tyson), but you really want to be a Bob (Jones, Orr, Hull, Cousy, Pettit, Gibson, Feller, Beamon, Mathias, Griese). If you’re an actor, Tom is terrific (Cruise, Hanks… um, Arnold), but James is probably better (Cagney, Stewart, Durante, Franco). And if you’re a writer, William is a mighty impressive name (Shakespeare, Faulkner, Maugham, Wordsworth, Yeats). But nothing matches the output of the Johns.

That might have been phrased better. But you understand. There is a personal attachment here. Three of my five favorite reads—Cannery Row, A Prayer for Owen Meany, and the Lord of the Rings trilogy—were John creations. But the list of notable Johns is remarkable across genres and eras and personal tastes.

The irony, of course, is that if you ask a writer—and if they’re being honest—many will say they do their best thinking on the john. So here are 48 of them (we didn’t even include the likes of Jonathan Swift and Jon Krakauer), along with a superlative or two about each:

1. John Steinbeck
He won the Nobel Prize for Literature. He was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom. He won the Pulitzer Prize for The Grapes of Wrath. And East of Eden is a classic. But many of us prefer his shorter works like Cannery Row and Of Mice and Men.

2. John Ronald Reuel Tolkien
Poet, philologist, Oxford professor, path-maker of modern fantasy literature. Forbes named him the fifth top-earning “dead celebrity” of 2009, just behind Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley. He’s why I’m a writer today.

3. John Updike
His series about Harry “Rabbit” Angstrom earned him a couple of Pulitzers (one of only three authors to win it more than once).

4. John Cheever
The “Chekhov of the suburbs” won the 1979 Pulitzer Prize for Fiction for The Stories of John Cheever. Upon receiving the National Medal for Literature just before he died of cancer a few years later, he told an audience “A page of good prose remains invincible.”

5. John Grisham
He has sold something close to 300 million books worldwide and is said to be one of only three authors to sell at least two million copies of a book on first printing (the others: Tom Clancy and J.K. Rowling). Eight of his novels have become films.

6. John Irving
Owen Meany is one of the most memorable characters in literature. Irving won an Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay for The Cider House Rules and a National Book Award for The World According to Garp, but Cheever edged him out for the 1979 Pulitzer.


7. John Muir
Yes, he founded the Sierra Club and almost single-handedly willed our national parks into existence, but his writings endure, too—although he once wrote, “One day’s exposure to mountains is better than a cartload of books.”

8. John Milton
The English 17th-century poet composed the epic poem “Paradise Lost” form 1658 to 1664, by which time he was blind and impoverished. He sold the publication rights to publisher Samuel Simmons for five pounds.

9. John Keats
He had only been writing serious poetry for six years before succumbing to tuberculosis at age 25. But none other than Jorge Luis Borges once stated that his first reading of this English Romantic poet was the most significant literary experience of his life.

10. John McPhee
A pioneer of creative nonfiction and Pulitzer Prize-winner, he avoided the more self-centered stream-of-consciousness styles of Hunter S. Thompson and Tom Wolfe, instead opting for an enduring amalgamation of detail and creative design.

11. John Edgar Wideman
A novelist and short story master who collects awards—everything from the International PEN/Faulkner Award (twice) and the O. Henry Award to the National Book Critics Circle Award and the James Fenimore Cooper Prize. Oh, and he also won a MacArthur genius grant.

12. John Kennedy Toole
A Confederacy of Dunces, the story of the adventures of unforgettable Ignatius J. Reilly, was published posthumously after Toole committed suicide at the age of 31. It won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction in 1981, a dozen years after his death.

13. John Hersey
Yet another Pulitzer-winning John, this one for the author and journalist’s first novel (A Bell for Adano). But his most notable work was a 31,000-word article about the aftermath of the atomic bomb explosion in Hiroshima, which occupied almost the entire issue of the August 31, 1946 issue of The New Yorker, a first and last for the magazine.

14. John D. MacDonald
Stephen King once praised this prolific author of suspense and crime novels as “the great entertainer of our age, and a mesmerizing storyteller.” In 1972, he was named a grandmaster of the Mystery Writers of America. Eight years later, he won the National Book Award.

15. John le Carre
He was born David John Moore Cornwell, but the pen name graces his classic spy novels, including The Spy Who Came in From the Cold and Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. His characters have been portrayed by actors like Richard Burton, Sean Connery, and Anthony Hopkins.



16. John James Audubon
Sure, call him a birdwatcher. But this French-Canadian author/painter’s The Birds of America identified 25 new species and is considered an ornithological masterpiece. Parks, parkways, schools, towns and counties have been named for him.

17. John Maxwell Coetzee
The South African novelist won the Nobel Prize in Literature in 2003, and he’s one of only three writers to twice win the Booker Prize. J.M. Coetzee is the reclusive type, so he didn’t collect either award in person.

18. John Locke
This English philosopher, considered the Father of Classical Liberalism, influenced the likes of Voltaire and Rousseau, not to mention the writers of the Declaration of Independence.

19. John Stuart Mill
On Liberty, published by this influential English philosopher in 1859, remains the foundation of much modern liberal political thought. Even today, succeeding presidents of the British Liberal Democrats pass it to one another as a symbol of office.

20. John Maynard Keynes
Keynesian. How many writers get an adjective? This British economist published various treatises that framed him as a founder of the field macroeconomics. Time magazine named him one of the 100 most important people of the 20th century.

21. John Bunyan
He was a 17th-century English writer and preacher, oft-persecuted and imprisoned a couple of times, and author of The Pilgrim’s Progress, a Christian allegory that has been translated into more than 200 languages and has never been out of print.

22. John Dos Passos
A “radical novelist” of the early 20th century, he is best known for his U.S.A. Trilogy consisting of three novels published during the 1930s—The 42nd Parallel, 1919,and The Big Money. The Modern Library ranked the trilogy 23rd among its list of the 100 best English-language novels of the century.

23. John Fowles
Named one of the 50 greatest British writers since World War II, he is best known for The Magus (named one of the Modern Library’s Best 100 Novels) and The French Lieutenant’s Woman (which was made into a film and nominated for an Oscar).

24. John Jakes
A prolific author of historical, western, science and fantasy fiction, including the bestselling Kent Family Chronicles and the North and Southtrilogy about the Civil War, which sold ten million copies and became and ABC miniseries.

25. John Lescroart
Sixteen of his series of legal and crime thrillers have appeared on The New York Times bestseller list. They have sold more than ten million copies and have been translated into 22 languages in more than 75 countries.


26. John Flanagan
The Australian fantasy writer is best known for his bestselling Ranger’s Apprentice series and, more recently, the Brotherband Chronicles.

27, John Ball
“They call me Mr. Tibbs!” Ball’s In the Heat of the Night won the Edgar Award for Best First Novel from the Mystery Writers of America and was made into the Oscar-winning film starring Sidney Poitier.

28. John Hart
The only author in history to win the best novel Edgar Award for four consecutive novels—The King of Lies, Down River, The Last Child, and Iron House.

29. John Feinstein
Author, columnist, sports commentator Feinstein has written some two-dozen books, including bestsellers A Season on the Brink (about Indiana basketball coach Bobby Knight) and A Good Walk Spoiled (about life on the PGA Tour).

30. John R. Erickson
Erickson is the award-winning author of more than 75 books, notably the Hank the Cowdog children’s series, which has sold nearly eight million copies.

31. John Lutz
The past president of the Mystery Writers of America, Lutz has won numerous awards for his mystery novels (including the Private Eye Writers of America Life Achievement Award).

32. John Barth
A postmodern American novelist and short story writer, he won the U.S. National Book Award for Fiction for Chimera in 1972. He shared that award with…

33. John Edward Williams
The novelist won it for Augustus, his fourth novel, which chronicled the violent times of Augustus Caesar. Many critics like his 1965 novel Stonereven more.

34. John Sandford
As a columnist in St. Paul, Minnesota, by the name of John Roswell Camp, he won a Pulitzer for a series of stories he wrote during the 1985 Midwest farm crisis. He has since written three series of acclaimed novels under the pen name John Sandford.

35. John Greenleaf Whittier
A 19th-century Quaker poet, ardent abolitionist and one of the founding contributors of Atlantic Monthly, he appeared on a U.S. postage stamp 48 years after his death.


36. John Pierpont
A slightly older contemporary of Whittier, fellow poet and abolitionist, he was the grandfather of financier J.P. Morgan and father of James Lord Pierpont, who wrote the song “Jingle Bells.”

37. John Searles
The author of three bestselling novels—Boy Still Missing, Strange But True (named the best novel of 2004 by Salon.com), and Help for the Haunted.

38. John Gilstrap
He’s the bestselling author of thrillers like High Treason, Damage Control, Threat Warning, Hostage Zero, No Mercy, and The Chopin Manuscript.

39. John Berryman
The Oklahoma-born poet and scholar (born John Allyn Smith, Jr.) is best known for his prolific collection The Dream Songs, which includes accounts of his struggle to understand his father’s suicide. He took his own life in 1972, jumping from the Washington Avenue Bridge in Minneapolis.

40. John Green
He won the 2006 Printz Award from the American Library Association for his debut young adult novel Looking For Alaska and followed it up with critically acclaimed novels like An Abundance of Katherines and The Fault in Our Stars.

41. John Everson
He is the author of a dozen novels and short story collections, all focusing on horror and the supernatural. Everson won the Bram Stoker Award for a First Novel for Covenant in 2004.

42. John Passarella
He writes horror novels and supernatural thrillers, including Wither, Wither’s Legacy, Kindred Spirit, and Shimmer.

43. John Connolly
An Irish writer known for his series of novels featuring antihero private detective Charlie Parker. His original book in the series, Every Dead Thing, was nominated for the Bram Stoker Award for Best First Novel.

44. John Boyne
This multi-award-winning Irish novelist’s eight novels for adults and four for young readers (including The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas) have been published in 46 languages.

45. John Locke
Not to be confused with #18 on our list, he’s a top John in the self-publishing world—bestselling author of the Donovan Creed Series.

46. John Graves
A regional icon in Texas, known for writing about the environment and the state, he passed away in July 2013, but not before twice being nominated for a National Book Award.

47. John Grogan
Journalist and nonfiction writer Grogan is best known for his bestselling 2005 book Marley and Me, about his family’s dog, which became a 2008 film starring Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston.

48. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The only president to win a Pulitzer Prize—for Profiles in Courage (1957), which consisted of eight mini-biographies of brave U.S. senators (he should have split the award with speechwriter Theodore Sorensen).




2 LOVERS BOUND BY STONE

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Valentine’s Day is a holiday we celebrate much like an anniversary in my house. On February 14, 1986, my wife and I went on our first date. We were a couple of high school kids in suburban Chicago. On a bitter cold winter evening, we saw The Color Purple (classic book, good film, not the best date movie). Still, the rest is matrimony.

So every February 14, I celebrate the occasion by penning a poem. Sometimes I channel Robert Browning, other times Dr. Seuss. Once I gave her 17 haikus to celebrate 17 years. A sample:

Often late at night
I love to watch you sleeping
even when you drool

Or there’s this one that I particularly like, a collection of various writers’ observations about love:


LOVE IS…                                                                                                         

At the edge of a petal, a wild rose on the bud
The root of the matter, the warmth of blood
A mutual self-giving, a friendship set on fire
The poetry of the senses, an irresistible desire
A concerto, a harmony, a pitch perfect tone
When the joy of another is essential to your own

Swimming in the ocean of another’s soul
A blaze that becomes a deep-burning coal
A pure silver flame, the closest thing to magic
Invisible but transforming, the antidote to tragic
An indivisible whole that begins with a smile
Doesn’t make the world go ‘round, but makes the ride worthwhile

Anesthesia as a perpetual state, a gift, a welcome curse
Reflexes and reflections, the Amen of the universe.
The emblem of eternity, artistry at its height
Measured by fullness, makes all that was heavy light
The soul’s master key, the enchanted dawn of the heart
Puts the fun in together, puts the sad in apart

Metaphysical gravity, divine vitality
A souvenir, delicious torment, spiritual sensuality.
The heart at your service, a madness most discreet
A great beautifier, a preserving sweet
Two volumes of one book, a single thought repeated twice
Knows no league, glimpses heaven, dwells in paradise

Strives toward more than it attains, knows not impossibility,
A confirmed passion, the bravest thing, the parent of humility.
Releases, promises, illumines, touches the sky
Like smoke made from the fume of sighs, like the perfect crime, like pi
Expands, cures, knows not why, feels no burden, rescues me
The accomplishment of a beautiful dream. All it’s cracked up to be

Not bad, right? But I fear that whatever I do, I will never top poet Robinson Jeffers.


If creating poetry is a bit like building a house—requiring careful construction and reflecting both philosophy and style—then it follows that a home is like a poem. This is most evident at Tor House, Jeffers’ longtime residence in the Carmel-by-the-Sea on California’s Monterey Peninsula. It is a lovely and lyrical place that he expanded painstakingly over the years, just as he expanded his body of poetry.

Upon their arrival in Carmel in 1914, Jeffers and his wife, Una, would often stroll to their favorite spot—a craggy hill (or tor) which would soon mark the site of their home, built primarily from the rocks of Carmel Point. Most days consisted of Jeffers constructing his poems in the morning and his home in the afternoon, a house with a coastal view so grand that Jeffers faced his desk inland, figuring otherwise he would never get any work done. The building offers a hint of worldly whimsy (one can spot portholes from one of Napoleon’s ships, a tombstone from Ireland, even a portion of the Great Wall of China). But at its essence, it is an intimate creation—especially Jeffers’s romantic decision to build for Una a stone tower on the premises.

For five years, Jeffers rolled boulders up from his private beach and meticulously set them into place, making “stone love stone,” as he put it. By the time he completed the structure, it was as much as six feet thick and almost forty feet high. He named it Hawk Tower, in honor of a frequent flying visitor, and observed, “I hung stone in the sky.”

So if you visit the tower,  you can corkscrew your way up a stairway to Una’s second-floor sanctuary, then ascend a little turret on the third floor, and then an even steeper stairway to the top of the turret. From there, you can look out toward the endless sea and the seashore upon which a man and his wife built their life together. And you can’t help but marvel that Robinson Jeffers’s finest love poem was made of stone. That’s the kind that lasts forever.



11 BEST BOOKS COMPILED FROM 11 “TOP 100” LISTS

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There have been a number of “100 best books” lists over the years. But what happens when you amalgamate those lists to select the books regarded as the best of the best? One enterprising reader (posting online under the name Scerakor) accepted the challenge.

He (she?) chose 11 such lists—from sources as varied as Time, Entertainment Weekly, Goodreads, Modern Library and Reddit—and compared them to find the most recommended books among the top-100 lists. Since today is November 11th—11/11—I thought it might be interesting to look at the 11 most cited books among the 11 lists.


The top three (appearing on 10 of 11 lists):
1.Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
2.Lolita (Vladimir Nabokov)
3.The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald)


The next four (appearing on 9 of 11 lists):
4.The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
5.The Sound and the Fury (William Faulkner)
6.Invisible Man (Ralph Ellison)
7.Slaughterhouse-Five (Kurt Vonnegut)


And the next four (appearing on 8 of 11 lists):
8.To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
9.The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
10.Beloved (Toni Morrison)
11.1984 (George Orwell)

So that’s the top 11 from the 11 top-books lists. Interesting, right? One book, Ernest Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises, appeared on seven of the lists. Another 14 books found their way onto six of the lists:

*Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
*On the Road (Jack Kerouac)
*The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (Mark Twain)
*Gone With the Wind (Margaret Mitchell)
*Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
*An American Tragedy (Theodore Dreiser)
*Midnight’s Children (Salman Rushdie)
*My Antonia (Willa Cather)
*The Heart is a Lonely Hunter (Carson McCullers)
*The Tropic of Cancer (Henry Miller)
*Their Eyes Were Watching God (Zora Neale Hurston)
*To the Lighthouse (Virginia Woolf)
*Ulysses (James Joyce)

Oh, and one more: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams), which at least lends a somewhat contemporary quality to what is largely an old-school inventory.


If I may just inject my opinion for a moment… How in the heck do three of the 11 lists leave out To Kill a Mockingbird? That should almost be automatic disqualification. Discard those three lists. They don’t even merit scrutiny. Of course, that was the only novel Harper Lee ever published. But I also find it fascinating that, among the 26 books above, no author has more than a single book ranked among the best of the best. Apparently, Animal Farm (Orwell), The Old Man and the Sea (Hemingway) and Mrs. Dalloway (Woolf) just missed, showing up on 5 of the 11 lists. But what about Tom Sawyer? Or one of my favorites, Cannery Row?

There were in fact, two-dozen books that earned mention on 5 of the 11 lists—everything from Crime and Punishment to Pride and Prejudice, from Heart of Darkness to Light in August, from Fahrenheit 451 to 100 Years of Solitude, from The Call of the Wild to The Age of Innocence, and from Lord of the Flies to The Lord of the Rings. Incidentally, The Hobbit made four of the lists. John Irving’s The World According to Garp appeared on five lists, too, but only 2 of the 11 top-100 lists included my other favorite by that prodigious talent, A Prayer for Owen Meany.


And, of course, the original 11 lists ranked the best novels ever written. Many of the finest books ever produced—Roots, The Right Stuff, Blue Highways—fall under the category of creative nonfiction. But that’s another list for another time.

82 MARVELOUS MARK TWAIN SAYINGS

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When it comes to a well-turned phrased, a rapier wit, a literary sense of humor, has there ever been anyone quite like Mark Twain? Of course, he would likely answer, “I have been complimented many times, and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough.” That quotation isn’t even one of his 82 finest, according to us at the Why Not 100. But the following do qualify as his best (and the first 14 are about reading and writing):

1. A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.

2. The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.

3. I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.

4. Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very'; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

5. The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

6. My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.

7. The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

8. It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

9. Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.

10. 'Classic.' A book which people praise and don't read.


11. Ideally a book would have no order to it, and the reader would have to discover his own.

12. Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written.

13. Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

14. Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.

15. What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing he knew nobody had said it before.

16. Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'

17. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

18. If the world comes to an end, I want to be in Cincinnati. Everything comes there ten years later.

19. Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.

20. Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.

21. Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

22. Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

23. Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.

24. It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.

25. It ain't those parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand.

26. When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.

27. Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

28. When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

29. Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.

30. It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.


31. Buy land, they're not making it anymore.

32. Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish.

33. Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied.

34. Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

35. Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.

36. Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.

37. Such is the human race, often it seems a pity that Noah... didn't miss the boat.

38. Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.

39. It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.

40. To refuse awards is another way of accepting them with more noise than is normal.


41. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.

42. What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce.

43. Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she laid an asteroid.

44. Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation.

45. Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.

46. Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

47. When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old.

48. The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little.

49. Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

50. Golf is a good walk spoiled.



51. A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.

52. The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.

53. Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

54. It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

55. When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.

56. To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.

57. I can live for two months on a good compliment.

58. I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.

59. A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

60. Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.


61. There are lies, damned lies and statistics.

62. It is easier to stay out than get out.

63. The secret of getting ahead is getting started.

64. It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.

65. No sinner is ever saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon.

66. The lack of money is the root of all evil.

67. The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

68. Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.

69. I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

70. Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

71. I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.


72. It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.

73. It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.

74. The educated Southerner has no use for an 'r', except at the beginning of a word.

75. You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

76. I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

77. Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.

78. He is now rising from affluence to poverty.

79. Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.

80. The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

81. All generalizations are false, including this one.

82. The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.












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